Friday, January 09, 2004

pinions of buddy don:
whuts the differnts?

via hobbs cums the news of whar them iraqis dun put them weppons of mass deestruckshun: accordin to sum newspaper in holland, theys in syria!

looks lack we need to do sum wurk on our spy saddlelites! how could we have missed em movin all them weppons, diggin up hidin places fer em, yew name it! after all, frum that state of the union speech bush give back in january of las year, we know thay wuz a heap of thangs to git moved:

(1) "Saddam Hussein had biological weapons sufficient to produce over 25,000 liters of anthrax -- enough doses to kill several million people. He hasn't accounted for that material."

(2) "Saddam Hussein had materials sufficient to produce more than 38,000 liters of botulinum toxin -- enough to subject millions of people to death by respiratory failure."

(3) "Saddam Hussein had the materials to produce as much as 500 tons of sarin, mustard and VX nerve agent. In such quantities, these chemical agents could also kill untold thousands."

(4) "Saddam Hussein had upwards of 30,000 munitions capable of delivering chemical agents."

(5) "Iraq, in the late 1990s, had several mobile biological weapons labs."

(6) "Saddam Hussein had an advanced nuclear weapons development program, had a design for a nuclear weapon and was working on five different methods of enriching uranium for a bomb."

(7) "The British government has learned that Saddam Hussein recently sought significant quantities of uranium from Africa."

mayhap on the way to the moon and mars (registrayshun required), we kin beef up our spy saddlelites a nuff to deteck when so minny thangs is bein moved 400 miles cross a barren desert.

reckon its time to invade syria yet?

meanwhile, provin jes how true the story frum that newspaper in holland really is, the united states has dun deecided thay aint no more reason to be lookin fer no weepons of mass deestruckshun in iraq: "The Bush administration has quietly withdrawn from Iraq a 400-member military team whose job was to scour the country for military equipment, according to senior government officials."

corse, sum folks aint never gonna git it. kin ye magine whut kinda thankin leads to puttin this kinda thang on the frunt page of the washinton post? whut kin they be thankin? iraqs weppons of mass deestruckshun wuz only on paper? so whut? we have to perteck ourself frum folks thats even puttin plans on paper to attack us.

fer instunts, magine ye larn thars sumbidy that hates yew. mayhap one of his kids runs away n cums to tell ye jes how much his daddy hates yew. mayhap he tells ye his daddy has writ down a plan to git the materials together sos he kin build a gun n shoot ye ded. woodnt ye have to kill him? i mean, hes gut the plans to kill ye, jes not the means.

i mean, really: whuts the differnts?

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