life of buddy don, chaptur 118: tell me a lil story

one of the thangs i larnt frum emily wuz jes how importunt the maginayshun is whenever it cums to sex. i reckon twuz always so fer me, but i caint say as how i had noticed it to such a degree till she cum along. corse, twuz the case whenever i gut to practicin kissin with darlene way back in chaptur 7: stains n uther complicayshuns one of the mane thangs i lacked to thank bout as i wuz fallin asleep n hopin fer one of them dreams wuz gittin to see darlene without a stitch on her. fack is, furst time i gut to see her thataway, twuz jes lack i had magined twuz a'gonna be.

but fer reasons i caint ritely splain, seem lack that kinda reackshun faded n it gut sos when suze wood ast me to take a bath or shower with her on a counta how she lacked to have sumbidy else wash her back, well, i wood git in that shower n go thru the hole thang without the furst thought of sex. corse, suze had her ways of brangin up the subjeck whenever we wuznt bathin. fack is, ifn ye could larn thangs by bein tole em, i wooda dun larnt thisn befor me n darlene ever gut hitched on a counta i wuz tole n even showed the fack of it, but i dint real eyes it fer years, till it tuck emily to demonstrate it sos i could git it finely.

way i wuz tole bout it wuz, i had a cuzin on mamas side of the fambly name of doyle mize, witch he wuz the son of aint sary n her furst husbin mike who wuz the bruther of ant ruths husbin pappy. innywho, he wuz oldern me n had dun been in the marines jes lack mos of the cuzins on mamas side of the fambly. that mint we figgerd mos innythang he ever sed had to be true. bein as i wuz so much yunger than him, i dint talk much with him, but he needed sum hep drivin a car cross cuntry one time n i wuz waitin to git marrd to darlene, so i wuz the one to doot. the trip tuck us thru las vegas n we went into one of them casinos they gut. we went sos we could git a free drank before goin to bed only i dint drank nuthin but coke on a counta not wontin him to know how i wuz a lergic to alkyhol.

while we wuz a'waitin fer sumbidy to brang roun the dranks, he wuz pullin on one of them one armed bandit thangs, witch i put a quarter in my ownself n gut $32 back in quarters, so i quit n tuck em to git em changed to foldin money. whenever i cum back, thay wuz a woman thar brangin the dranks n i wuz sprized bout how she dint have a stitch of clothin on ceptn her shoes n a par of long gloves n a lil collar that dint have no shirt attached toot. i kindly looked tuther way n wuz sprized how it dint git no reackshun frum me. i hadnt hardly been roun no nekkid women up to then n seemed lack in my maginayshun they wood git me aroused jes by the fack of thar bein nekkid, but in this case, it seemd mosly sad.

we tuck our dranks n doyle finishd feedin his quarters to the machine till it finely turnt him a'loose n we went up to a free room he'd gut us. thay wuz two beds in thar n we each tuck one. rite as i wuz bout to fall asleep he sed, 'aint nuthin less sexy than a nekkid woman.' i ast him why wuz that n he sed that when ye thank bout whut turns ye on, tiz sumthin that happens whenever the woman still has her cloze on n yer trine to cunvints her she mite wonta let em be tuck off. 'tis the seduckshun thats sexy, not the nekkid body.'

thatn tuck me years of pondern on till i could see jes whut he meant. corse whenever twuz jes darlene n me, we wuz havin sex lack twuz homewurk that ye had to do ever nite, witch i dun rote bout that in that chaptur 80 name of sex. we dint play roun too much with no seduckshun. twuz lack innythang with darlene whar ye had to git thangs started n dun the quickest way ye could do, so lack as not, we wood both be nekkid befor innythang gut a'goin.

thangs with susannah wuz differnt in most ways ceptn one, witch she wood let ye know she wuz purty much either in the mood or not n ifn twuz the latter, thay wuznt nuthin ye could do to cunvints her otherwise, n ifn twuz the former, twuz jes a matter of gittin to whutever twuz she lacked, witch she wood be nekkid bout as quick as we deetermined she wuz in the mood. one time i suggested how it mite be fun ifn she wood leeve sum of her cloze on durin the ack, lack ifn she wuz to wear a skirt without panties or ifn she wuz to let me buy sumthin sexy fer her to wear in the bed. that suggestchun led to one of our wurst fuss n fites ever. she claimed i dint luv her -- the real her -- but wonted to turn her into sum kinda fantasy of sum kind. i made thangs wurser by astin why did we have to keep fantasies out of our sex life n she ackted lack ifn i had to ast the questchun, then twuz obveeyus i dint unnerstand the most basick thangs bout her.

taint lack she wuznt willin to do sum verr sexy thangs n sumtimes ye could only do em whenever she still had her cloze mosly on, lack how she luved to doot out in natchur sumwhar n then twood be a matter of bein reddy quick to put yer cloze back on ifn sumbidy wuz to cum by. we mite be out paddlin in her canoe n spot a nice place to park n git out fer a bite n purty quick after we had smoked one of her skinny lil joints after eatin, she mite cummence to gittin idees bout havin me 'take her up agin that tree,' witch twernt as sexy a thang as it sounds ritin it now. we wood git over by the tree n git to kissin n she mite pull her pants n panties bout halfway down n ast wood i git on my knees, witch twuznt the bes posishun to get at her fer much moren makin shore she wuz properly lubrickated. she dint eggspeck to have no orgasum in such circumstances on a counta how twuz almos impossibull fer her to let herself go a nuff fer that even ifn she wuz home in her own bed. but purty soon i wood be standin n have my pants undun n she wood turn n hug the tree n ast me to take her. i wood doot, tho twernt near as sexy as it sounds now on a counta how i wuz watchin out to make shore nobidy wuz cummin by n trine to keep my pants frum slippin down to the ground n fack is, i wuz manely trine to finish on a counta durin such a episode, mane thang she wonted wuz fer me to cum.

ye mite kin member a book that cum out in 1972 name of the joy of sex, witch the bes thang that cum frum that wuz a nuther book by nashunul lampoon name of the job of sex. thang is, even with sumbidy lack suze ye could git to whar twuz the job of sex on a counta how she lacked to judge it by how minny times had we had it durin a sartin spell. ifn we hadnt dun it durin a week, then she figgerd we needed to doot a lil exter the nex week. she figgerd twernt healthy ifn we wuznt gittin it a lease three times a week, witch that dont sound lack much, but whenever yer wurkin differnt skedules lack we wuz, twuz a bit trublesum to fit it all in. she wuz also verr quick to git a yeast infeckshun but that dint mean she wonted to change the frequency inny only the method. corse, bein as how she could only reach her climax one way, that bein the delicut applicayshun of my tung, thay wuz plenty of times when she dint even speck to cum close to no release fer her own self. but that dint matter nun on a counta how she could tell fer sartin whuther i had cum n that wuz purty much how she wuz a'measurin thangs.

as ye mite speck, thangs wuz cumpletely differnt with emily. she felt lack it ruint thangs to have sex jes to have sex. she dint wont it lessn bofus wuz rilly a'wontin it. she dint lack havin it in the dark n dint lack havin it too much in dint lack it to be too perdictabull. she also dint thank sex wuz bout everthang ye could do leadin up to 'the male orgasum' n then rollin over to take a nap. fack is, she dint thank that the male orgasum had that much to do with good sex, mayhap on a counta she rilly larnt bout good sex frum havin it with that german teechur name of laura bishop. way she saw thangs, the male orgasum made a good epilog fer the mane story of sex, witch twuz the minny orgasums a woman mite have while keepin her man rite on the edge till he figgerd he wuz a'fixin to burst, witch she lacked to make me hold back jes a lil longer till i the burstin wuz almos moren i could take.

she also bleeved qualty wuz more importunt thatn quanty. so it could be weeks betwixt sesshuns n then we mite do lil else durin a hole weekend. she never lacked to have it after dark on a counta how she wuz turnt on by bein seen whenever ye finely pulled her jeans n panties off her. corse, she dint thank twuz rite to dress sexy: she also still dressed purty much lack she mite still be sparkin with laura bishop, witch her uniform wuz a flannel shirt, a pair of blue levis, underwired bra, cotton high-waisted panties, knee socks n boots or sturdy shoes that she bought in the mens department.

twuznt lack she dint unnerstan the power of a sexy image. long bout that time, we gut to whar we wood haunt used bookstores n one time we wuz out at a lil flea market place out on alcoa hiway, witch virgil n mj luved visitin the big flea market they had out thar ever week. on the way home, we mite git em to stop by that other flea market, witch virgil lacked lookin thru old colleckshuns of nashunul geografic or scientific amurkin. innywho, on this particlar trip i wuz pickin up a copy of the norton antholgy of amurkin literchur fer a dime whenever she sum up n sed thay wuz sumthin i should see in a lil back room. turnt out they had em a colleckshun of erotick literchur n mens magazines back thar. she had dun picked out a book name of the romance of lust n ast did i wonta git sum of them penthouse magazines, witch she sed they had sum good letters. corse i had dun been a'knowin that on a counta i had a huge colleckshun of mens magazines that i gut rid of whenever me n suze had that fite when i ast her bout keepin sum cloze on durin sex that wuznt outdoors. innywho, they wuz lettin em go fer 50¢ a copy or three fer a buck or 20 fer a five spot, witch the mos amazin thang bout that wuz how emily figgerd we should go with the best deal even if $5 wuz a lot fer us. but we picked up a see leckshun of em along with romance of lust n a book name of arabella.

twuz one of them moments in a marrg whar thangs changes ferever even ifn ye dont real eyes tiz whuts a'happenin. we gut home n let virg n mj cum up on a counta how i wonted to git hi n dint have no smoke, but twuz purty clear that me n emily wuznt much in the mood fer visitin. whenever virgil suggested we git a six pack, mj sed twuz time to go n let the two luvbirds git to whut theys rilly wontin to do. it tuck a lil while fer virgil to git whut she wuz a'sayin n then he wonted to talk bout it, but she gut up n sed he could stay ifn he lacked, but she wonted to git sum beer n git home. wuz he cummin? corse we hadnt sed he could stay the nite on our couch n dint have no plan to offer it, but he had a habit of stayin purty often durin the week. emily sed she needed to study.

'besides, buddys gut about a millyun papers to grade' n she she splaind how i wuz jes acktin lack i wonted a visit when whut i needed wuz to git to wurk. besides, she sed, tellin a lie that cawt me by sprize, 'he dun tuck one of them columbas fer his asthma n he aint spozed to drank after em.' that clinched it fer virgil on a counta in them daze he dint much lack to drank alone.

the door slammed on em finely n bout as quick as ye could say jimmy crack corn, emily n me wuz a'lyin in the bed with her astin me wood i unclip her bra, witch i dun it n she pulled it out sum kinda way women have whar they kin git thar bra off without takin off thar shirt. then she had me cum up beside of her, pillers piled hi sos she could lean agin the hed of the bed n read. we gut to lookin thru sum of them penthouse magazines n commentin on witch of the women looked best n witch looked jes plane stupid n why twuz that men lacked to look at women a'wearin practickully nuthin n assumin odd posishuns that folks dint normally use fer nuthin, not even sex, in real life. but twuz a verr sexy thang to do n we wuz bof so turnt on thar purty soon she ast wood i hep her pull off her pants n panties, witch while i dun that, all but one of them buttons on her shirt cum undun. i wuz still dressd n whenever i started to take off my pants, she ast wood i leave em on fer a bit, so i dun it. she wuz sittin so that even tho she wuz near nekkid, ye couldnt see nuthin on a counta the shirt hung down twixt her legs n she had her knee socks pulled to her knee n that one button kep thangs to whar ye couldnt git much moren a peak now n agin.

now ye mite could thank they wuznt much in this worl sexier than havin emily thar dressd lack she wuz n all, but twuznt nuthin new. she never wore nuthin differnt n as we leafed thru sum of them pitchers, i tride to point out how sexy it made them women to be a'wearin thangs lack stockins n skirts n all, but that jes made her say they had the bodies fer it n whenever i sed she did too, she tuck it lack twuz a insult, so i gut to kissin on that speshul place on her neck n then to strokin her thighs n gittin close but not touchin whar she wuz wontin me to. she gut to whar she wuz lyin back jes waitin fer me to finely make contack, but i dint do moren cum close. this hole time i wuz acktin lack she wuz showin me sumthin with them magazines tht i hadnt seen but a cuple times befor, so i ast her bout them letters she had mentchunned. she picked one of em back up n gut to readin.

purty soon i couldnt resist the urge to touch her whar she wonted it n purty soon i put my tung whar my fangers had been n she kep a readin till she cummenced to havin her orgasums, witch twuz always the odd-numberd one that wuz tuff fer her. so it tuck four letters before i felt her breathin reach a sartin state n then them twitches cummenced n purty soon she had her furstn, witch bout as quick as she quit twitchin the nextn started. then she wonted me to take my pants off sos she could see but she dint wonta touch yet till she had read thru sevrul munths wurth, a gittin her orgasums two by two till she finely sed she wonted to watch me. i dint know eggzackly whut she meant by that, but turnt out she wonted me to take keer of my ownself, witch i dint wonta doot till she sed she wonted to see whuther twuz hot lack it sed in one of them stories n that gut me a'goin till we proovd how twuz hottern she eggspeckted. as ye mite speck with emily, twernt the end of the fun by inny means but jes the start.

long bout the middle of the nex week, after we had et our dinner n watched barney miller n she had washed the dishes, twuz time fer me to go to bed, witch she always stayed up latern i did. but i wuz back leaned up agin the hed of the bed trine to read george merediths book name of the egoist when the door opend n in she cum. turnt out she had been feelin a lil guilty durin the hole marrg on a counta she knew i needed sex more often than she did. twuz a lil part of how she dint see the plot of sex with a man to be about the rise n fall of his penis, i reckon. she cuddled up n i gut to wunderin whuther she wuz in the mood, witch twuz after dark n she dint seem lack that wuz whut she wonted. finely she ast did i wonta look at one of them magazines. i ast her did she but she sed twuznt bout whut she wonted. she wuz wundern whuther i wood lack to look at one. i sed i mite, so she brung the hole stack out frum the closet n set em on the floor by my side of the bed. she tuck one out, witch it had sum pitchers she knew i lacked a lot, n she gut to astin me bout each pitcher n then she ast could she watch me agin. i ackted a lil stupid by astin her whut did she wonta watch. she sed she wonted to see whuther twuz true that a man could give his ownself a orgasum bout as good as inny he could git frum sex. i tole her twuznt n all, but she had read it n wonted to see n ast me to give myself the bestn i could do. so i dun it n she wuz eggcited a nuff to touch her ownself while she wuz a'watchin till whenever twuz over i had dun my one n she had dun four. she sed twuz eggcitin to see how eggcited i gut.

after that, she wonted me to do the same thang ever nite. mayhap twuz a strategy on a counta once i had cummenced with that habit, she figgerd twoodnt matter ifn we went three weeks without, witch we did that ever now n then but i never blamed her fer it. she sed she figgerd twood be good ifn we gut to whar the male orgasum wuznt the mane goal of sex n ifn twuz sumthin i had everday, mayhap twood keep thangs in perspecktive. i ast had i ever made her feel lack twuz jes my orgasum that matterd n she swore up n down it dint till i could tell sumhow that it kindly did.

the verr nex saturdy we wuz a'readin our books till shawn cum over to watch merchant of venus with us. i wuz glad he cum by since he had sum of theevil weed, witch i couldnt hardly git nun of my own. innywho, after he had left, a'givin me a purty thick lil joint on the way out, i broke up the joint to whar i could git a nuff to git hi four or five times usin a pipe n loaded up a lil. whenever i wuz a'doin that, emily sprized me by pullin out romance of lust n readin. corse, readin out loud to each other wus sumthin we had dun a lot, startin in west germany, so twuznt no sprize that she mite be readin out loud, but twuz a sprize whut she wuz a'readin. purty soon her pants n panties wuz lyin in a lil puddle on the livin room floor n we wuz each a'usin our tungs to turn tuthern on. i lost count of how minny times she had cum whenever she ast me did i wonta 'take her,' witch fer sum reason it really turnt her on to ast me to take her or even to do other thangs to her. she lacked all the wurds that ye aint allowd to say on tv. fack is, she wuz turnt on lack nobidy i had ever knowd by hearin wurds.

that led me to try ritin sumthin a lil racy to read to her, so i dun it. i rote one whar the two of us wuz on a beach n we had drunk sum wine till she had dun fell asleep. in the story i restrained her sum kinda way to whar she couldnt see nor git up neethur one n then i tuck off her bikini bottoms n told her bout how folks wuz reacktin to seein her displayd lack that. ye couldnt hardly find nuthin to make her hotter n purty soon i gut to whar i wood make em up n be whisperin em in her ear till she wood ast me to take her but to be verr still n read more. i wood read n sum kinda way them wurds wood be lack fangers a'touchin her jes rite till i could hear how her breathin n twitchin wuz reachin that point whar she meltin, all frum the sexy stroke of wurds.

now corse, lack as not the touch of wurds wood be accentchewaited by the touch of fangers, mine or hers, but the thang that gut me most bout this wuz how emily spent almos her entire life inside the covers of a book. she wuz the readinest person i ever met. so twuz natcherul how we wood read out loud to each other. whut i dint real eyes then n even tuck a good while longer to larn it wuz how she dint lack the worl outside of books. she dint lack the real worl, startin with her own bidy. no matter how i mite beg her to try wearin sumthin a lil differnt frum knee socks n flannel shirt, lease now n then whenever we wuz in bed, she woodnt doot.

fer one thang, lack ever woman i ever gut to know, she jes dint lack her bidy all that much. she figgerd her calves wuz too big, witch that cum frum a'wearin earth shoes fer years, lease cordin to how she tole it. she also thought her smell wuz too strong n her behind too flat n yew name it, she could find a flaw of sum kind. so she dint lack the real thang, dint lack dressin up. she could see how the look of such dress mite be purty a nuff to git yer injuns a'racin, but she figgerd in the real worl n with her bidy, twoodnt wurk. it dint matter nun how much i tole her i lacked her bidy, how nice her figger wuz, how purty her breasts n laigs n her n mouth. dint matter nun on a counta she had dun passd judgment on her ownself n innythang i tride to tell her made her wunder why i wood lie to her bout sumthin lack that lessn i wuz wontin to get sumthin. funny thang wuz, i wuz a'wontin to git sumthin, witch twuz the same thang she wuz a wontin to git, but she dint wont it ifn she thought i had dun lied to her bout her bidy. twood git us into a fuss n fite, lack as not.

but ifn she wuz readin us sum of them letters from penthouse or frum sum of the erotica we wuz gittin at the flea markets or even better, ifn i wuz whisperin a sexy tale in her ear, then twuznt lack twuz a lie she wuz a'hearin but lack a truth too good to be real. ye mite could thank this wuz a strange kinda way to live, but twuz a purrfeck match in lots of ways. she lacked stories n i lacked makin em up n ritin em down now n then.

so she lived mos of her life lack twuz a story in a book n ackted kindly lack a liberry lady who wonted ye to hush up sos folks could read. corse, that jes made thangs hotter whenever twood appear lack she dint have no innerest atall in sex n bit by bit i wood cunvints her till she wood finely start kissin me back a lil. but kisses n touchin is real n kin only go so far. ifn she wuz a'gone let herself git seduced, twood be a battle all the way, witch that made it all the sweeter whenever she give in. twuz a verr sexy moment whenever she dun it n twood generly cum with the same statement of surrender: 'why dont ye tell me a lil story?'