Wednesday, April 14, 2004

pinions of buddy don:
three quick obsurvayshuns

whut did he know n when did he fergit it?
ifn ye subscribe to The Nation, then ye kin read this here statement by mr cheney, witch seems lack he has a purty good unnerstandin of thangs:

Once you've got Baghdad, it's not clear what you do with it. It's not clear what kind of government you would put in place of the one that's currently there.... How much credibility is that government going to have if it's set up by the United States military when it's there?... I think to have American military forces engaged in a civil war inside Iraq would fit the definition of quagmire, and we have absolutely no desire to get bogged down in that fashion.

that wuz dick cheney in 1991 eggsplainin why we wuznt gonna make the miss take of trine to take baghdad. too bad he fergut.

wood ye hire sumbidy that dint never add mitt to makin no miss takes?
in my bizness, i gut to innerview n deecide whuther to hire folks. one of the questchuns i always ast em is how they handle thangs whenever they make miss takes. ifn they tell me they dont make no miss takes, then i wont cunsidder hirin em. heres why: in our bizness -- keepin cumputers a'goin sos bankers kin make lots of money -- ye cant do much of nuthin without makin a miss take now n then. ifn ye add mitt it, then ye kin figger out whut needs to be dun to fix it n to keep frum makin the same miss take agin. ifn ye caint, ye make everthang much wurser. so i guess ye kin see why i woodnt never hire mr bush to wurk fer me:

Q. In the last campaign, you were asked a question about the biggest mistake you'd made in your life and you used to like to joke that it was trading Sammy Sosa. You've looked back before 9/11 for what mistakes might have been made. After 9/11, what would your biggest mistake be, would you say? And what lessons have you learned from it?

A. Hmmm. I wish you'd have given me this written question ahead of time so I could plan for it. I'm sure historians will look back and say, Gosh, he could have done it better this way or that way. You know, I just — I'm sure something will pop into my head here in the midst of this press conference with all the pressure of trying to come up with an answer, but it hadn't yet.

perdickshun of buddy don
ifn we make the miss take -- n make no miss take about it, twood be a miss take -- of ackshly captchurin or killin moktada al-sadr, then i perdick we will git a war started not with jes the dead-enders, the bitter-enders, the remnunts of the ba'athists, the terrsts who keep a'cummin to iraq to attack us, the thugs n evil doers who hates democracy n wonts to stop us befor we kin git it started -- no we wont have a war with jes these folks thats alreddy attackin us, tho they probly wood claim they wuz jes defendin tharself n thar cuntry n thar relijun; no, we wood have us a war with mos all of islam, a real reljus war. tiz dubly true ifn we take him out of the sankchewary of the mosque.

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