Monday, April 19, 2004

life of buddy don, chaptur 113:
back home

sumbidy that lacks to read thangs lack heracleitus lack i had dun minny a time befor even goin to west germany, sumbidy lack that shouldnt be sprized to find ye caint go back to the same home ye left, witch heracleitus is the one that sed ye caint step into the same river twice on a counta how the flow makes it differnt water each time ye step in it. the flow of life duz the same thang to folks n places ye lack to thank on as home.

corse twernt only home that had changed. me n emily had dun our share of changin too, only that wernt sumthin we wood notice right off. ye caint hep but wonta git home n tell sum tales bout yer add ventchurs livin overseas, caint hep but wonta share whut ye dun, caint hep but wonta show off the books ye bought n thangs ye larned. whuts all too easy to fergit is how folks back home has been a'changin n readin books n cummin up with thangs to share with ye.

we spent the furst week makin the rounds of our friends. mama had a lil dinner fer us with ham n turkey n all the mizes thar, witch we hadnt seen sum of em in years. ye mite wood thank they wood wonta know sumthin bout how thangs had gone in west germany, but they wuz manely glad we had made it back home safe n that no war had broke out while we wuz over thar.

corse, thay wuz moments. uncle arnold wuz thar. he had dun been to the soviet union n he wuz ranked way up in the marine corps reserve so as ye mite reckon, he wuz a lil on the conservative side, speshly regardin nashunull defents, witch he bleevd carter wuz invitin the russians to attack us by projecktin weakness. innywho, whenever he went to the soviet union, he brung back some toilet paper sos he could demonstrate the differnts twixt thar system n ours. twuz a cunvintsin bit of paper whenever we furst saw it. twuz ruff as could be n seemd lack twuz made out of recyculled paper. so we had to brang sum of the toilet paper back frum wharever we went. fack is, i had a lil colleckshun frum all them places we visited. turnt out twuz all purty bad. ifn twuznt ruff, twuz slick lack wax paper n ye had to wunder why innybidy wood thank twood git ye clean. but that paper gut passd round till uncle arnold left on a counta how he hated bein razzed thataway. i dint git a chants then or ever to tell him bout all the mizes i found buried in the jewish cemetary.

innywho, we made the rest of the rounds. i showed virgil my colleckshun of nietzsche, witch we had always talked lots bout his flossofy, but seemed lack it made him mad. only thang he wood say wuz how he dint read german. he wuz drankin that evenin while everbidy wuz passin round joints, witch twuz a bit of a shock, even fer a old doper lack me,  how everbidy wuz gittin hi all the time. mane thang i member bout that evnin wuz how i wonted to talk to him bout the thangs i had seen, includin the toilet paper on a counta how his dad had brought sum back frum east germany, but he pointed out he had dun seen the toilet paper whenever he wuz over thar livin on the economy. i dont know whut brought it on, but at a certain point, with no warnin, he threw a full beer rite at my head, witch i duck n it hit the wall of his lil house n broke rite through the paper thin sheet rock.

visited eli, witch all he wonted to talk bout wuz how he had been dead durin his suicide attempt but had cum back to life. mama had dun been tole he wuz a'gonna be a vegtabull at best n how he had been nuthin but fer near two weeks, but then he started cummin back. he claimed he had lost sum memries cumpletely, but most of em wuz fillin thayselves in. he dint wonta here nuthin bout our trip, witch i had dreamed of talkin to him bout sum of the flossofy we had read together n sum of the thangs i had larnt bout it durin my travels, but he dint wonta here it. he claimed he had dun herd a nuff whenever mama wuz a'tellin everbidy everthang i had writ home in letters.

maisie ast could i take a ride with her, so i did. emily sed she dint mind stayin at mamas n readin, so we rode down to melton hill n parked whar we had parked minny a time over the years. she sed she wuz thankin maybe she wood marr oscar clowder. witch thang bout that wuz how she dint seem lack she wuz really all that much in luv with him. so why wuz she cunsidderin it? she shrugged, lit a nuther cigarette, burned bout a quarter of it, stubbed it out. i waited fer her to way sumthing. finely i ast her why she wuz thankin bout doin sumthin she dint seem to wonta do. she anserd how she figgerd that wuz thonly thang ye ever git to do in life innyway. i wonted to argue, but she gut quite n sed she dint wonta fuss. couldnt we jes watch the water fer a while?

befor we could go back to looseburg fer a while, randy fox sed he had a sprize fer us n that he wonted us to cum over on a saturdy to spend the nite. he n jenny skinner had dun deevorced on a counta she wuz ackshly a lesbian. seemd lack thay wuz more to the story, but randy woodnt tell nun of it. we had borried mamas car n tole her we wuz stayin the nite. we gut to his new place, one of them apartment complexes they wuz a'bildin out on kingston pike, witch it had a swimmin pool n lots of green lawn round it. he tole us he had saved us each a hit of mescalin n he wuznt takin no backtalk whenever he offerd it. twuz the furst time fer emily n i spekted her to make a scene to stop it, but she sed twuz about time she tripped.

i dont member all that much bout that trip, only that randy tuck us outside n set us down under a tree n lit a joint n lef us thar. we spent the afternoon doin nuthin but starin each other in the eye. twuz a grate trip to whar it seemd lack we wuz one person fer a spell. randy tuck our pitcher under that tree n whenever i look at it, im sprized to see how long my hair wuz n how skinny we bofus wuz. we had on shorts n wuz sittin rapped aroun each other. we wuz up till way late in the night, lack ye mite speck, so whenever twuz time to sleep, we sed we figgerd we wood drive out to the farm, witch he wuz so sleepy he dint fite us on it. that afternoon n evenin wuz amung the best times me n emily ever had.

frum thar, we finely drove to looseburg. went thru the parties on fridy nite, the dinner at nanny's the next day, the supper out in the country on sundy. twuz verr nice to see everbidy, but dint nobidy wonta hear nuthin bout west germany. twuz so strange to us. we wuz loded with stories dint nobidy wonta here.

so we spent the rest of august thar in looseburg layin out in the sun on lounge chairs in the back yard. twuz a long way frum the nearest naybor, so we could git near nekkid n git a purty good tan. twuz nice to be so lazy, but twuz odd how nuthin felt lack home.

purty soon august wuz over n twuz time to git back to knoxvull n wurk on getting set up fer skool, witch we gut us a partment in laurel student housin. we dint have hardly nuthin to put in it. my old piano. a cuple chairs mama give us. a bed frum pete smith. a used tv frum milton mansfield. emilys ole stereo. but thang wuz, whenever we gut our thangs set up, even tho we dint have no sheets n had to use our sleepin bags fer linen, once we gut everthang in thar n closed n locked the door, we knew we wuz finely home.

everbidy wonted to ack lack we hadnt never been away, lack they wood ignore how we hadnt called nobidy back fer a year. they dint wonta here nuthin bout our time in west germany. whut they dint know -- whut we dint know eethur -- wuz how that time over in west germany wuz the best year of our marrg.

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