Saturday, December 31, 2005

fishin of buddy don: a fine mess of keepers

yesterdy i ast fer a lil hep in findin sum good idees fer musick. i cum away with the follerin stranger of keepers (witch turns out me n miz bd dun had a cuple of em alreddy):ifn ye gut inny other idees of good musick fer me n miz bd to try out, please leave em in a comment.

finely jes fer fun ...

buddy don trine to catch a fish:

Friday, December 30, 2005

request of buddy don: lil hep?

tiz the time of year when folks lacks to revue whuts dun happend in the last year. they make lists n try to sum up whuts importunt bout whut went on.

thays a few goodns today. ye gut Eugene Robinson's We're All Going To Die!, David Ignatius' The Year in Bad News n my fevert frum todays paper, Paul Krugman's Heck of a Job, Bushie.

that dont mean that reglar stories aint out thar. ye gut that 16 year old a'goin to iraq to study the situwayshun his ownself (he survived).

then thars that story bout how the CIA is gittin more n more powerful all the time. skeery stuff! mayhap tiz necessairy. i caint say, but taint the kinda thang i wuz taught bout in skool whenever they give us instruckshun bout whut we stand fer.

rosa brooks has a lil punditry claimin that impeachment is lackly to be in george bushs future, witch duz that mean they wood wont cheney to be presdint? or is thar a plan to do a double-impeachment? presdint hastert, innybidy? corse, ifn thay wuz a impeachment or even a double impeachment, ye wood half to thank twood be dimcrats in cuntrol of the house, witch tiz a bit optimistick fer dimcrats to dream of that.

but i wonted to git back in touch with musick, witch is whar i am hopin to git a lil hep. ever since they killt radio as i used to luv it with the telecommunications ack of 1996, i caint hardly listn to no radio. so i have dun lost touch with musick thats current. in sted, i been buyin ole bluegrass n classicks frum the dinosaur rock n roll era.

now that miz bd dun give me that ipod, i been wontin to git sum albums thats current. so i looked up sum of the best albums of 2005. i seen bands i aint never heard of n real eyesed that i am cumpletely out of it.

so heres my request, witch could ye putt yer anser to this questchun in a comment?:
whut are the best albums ye have heard since 1996?
jes to give ye a idee of whar my head is, heres a list of the last few albums me n miz bd has bought our ownself or that sumbidy give us:as ye kin see, we gut a lot to learn. aint never heard no coldplay, wheezer, bright eyes, white stripes, fiona apple, beck nor a slew of otherns. thays all listed as best of the year, but hurts that i dont know a one of em.

so ifn ye kin spare the time, could ye let me know in a comment whut album(s) ye wood buy to sorta catch up with whuts a'gone on? i wood grately appreciate it!

Thursday, December 29, 2005

mizry of buddy don: nuther migraine

whenever i wuz doin yesterdys blog, i wuz feelin poorly n wundern ifn i wuz gittin a migraine, wundern ifn i wuz a'gone be able to git thru the day without takin zomig. i dint wonta thank i could be havin a nuther migraine, so i kept to my daily skedule, includin not makin erbs, witch i been a'takin em ever sundy, tuesdy n thursdy.

but miz bd wuznt fooled a mint. frum the instunt i give in to requests i drank sum vermouth durin our chrismus dinner at jack n vaclavs, she notissd i wuz havin sum of the migraine symptums she has seen in the past.

lessun larnt: i caint even have a sip or two of wine, not even jes to be plite. tiz poison fer me.

innywho, i went on into wurk yesterdy but i dint make it but about a hour befor i knew i wood half to git home to take that zomig or risk vomitin all day long. i hate that stuff fer how it makes me so comatoes, but tiz bettern the alternative.

miz bd gut her ownself on the case, treatin me with aromatherpy shes been a'studyin, rubbin the essential oil of peppermint on my temples n the base of my neck n on my thumbs n big toes n under my nose. if nuthin else, it changed the topick of the internull conversayshun in my mind frum the migraine to all them smells.

then she had me stretch out on the table fer a reiki sesshun. them thangs is magick.

after she wuz dun, i went to bed whar i cuntinued sleepin (ye kin sleep rite thru a reiki sesshun).

i am feelin much better this mornin. i hope fer a hole day a wurk. tiz good news in a way on a counta how the las migraine i had wuz three munths ago n the one befor thatn wuz three munths earlier. besides that, the last one lasted over five days. thisn, not to weauxphf, seems lack its over after jes one day of mizry n a few days of symptums.

meanwhile, whos a'gone win, the partisans or the patriots? heres a list of sum contests twixt em, bof to cum n frum last year:

Wednesday, December 28, 2005

nite life of buddy don: late chrismus dinner

las nite we had us a real treat: dinner at keens with loretta n her fee-on-say paddy. we had us as fine a evenin as ye could ever magine. miz bd had made gifts fer all them kids n parnts too. seem lack it hit a home run with bof loretta n paddy, speshly the homemade wurry dolls.

corse, dinner wuz grate: paddy had thar world famus mutton chop, loretta the filet minyawn, miz bd a giant piece of cod n i the aged sirloin. we had sum scotch as we generly do: lagavulin 12, unchillfiltered caol ila 11, unchillfiltered glen rothes 12, linkwood 10 n mortlach 12. used to be we could go to keens n never drank nuthin we had dun drunk befor, but we caint hardly say that no more on a counta how we dun tride our bes to try ever one of em.

so twuz one of the bes meals ever: good cumpny, good food, good scotch, a cab that seemed to be a'waitin fer us n a bus at port authorty with no line to stand on (or to stand 'in', ifn ye aint frum places whar ye stand 'on' lines lack ye do up in here).

ifn yer trine to keep a counta them blessins, we jes hit
blessins = infinity + 1
this mornins papers has a lil good cheer too:
  1. thay mite be a chants fer sum of them folks that lost big on enron to git sum justus

  2. zoos is cummencin to give thought to whut to do with elefants that needs to run free or at lease have a big a nuff place to roam to whar they live a lil more natcherull

  3. releaf fer the downtrodden wealthy: mr bushs economy has been verr verr good to them thats alreddy rich

  4. mayhapy whut mr bush wonts to do is brang a lil parity – kindly lack the nfl has dun – to that thar war on terr on a counta how his illegal wiretappin of who knows how minny folks has dun give terr suspecks a new line of deefents, witch seems lack mr bush is bein a lil overly genrus with them suspecks

  5. witch, that means them deefents lawyers in them terr cases is happy too
have yerself a grate day!

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

pinions of buddy don: ifn i ever grow up

ifn i wuz to grow up sumday n git to be a pundit, i wood lack to be as good as Eugene Robinson, witch he rites fer the washington post. this mornin, he has dun sed mos everthang i wont to say bout whuther the 'grown ups in charge' should have to obey the law:
Let's assume that George W. Bush's claim of virtually unfettered presidential power is not just an exercise in reclaiming executive perks that Dick Cheney believes were wrongly surrendered after Watergate. Let's assume that Bush genuinely believes he needs the right to blanket the nation with electronic surveillance, detain indefinitely anyone he considers a terrorist suspect, make those detainees disappear into secret, CIA-run prisons, and subject them to "waterboarding" and other degradations. Let's assume for the moment that the president's only desperate motivation is to prevent another day like Sept. 11, 2001.

Let's go even further and assume he decided to invade Iraq for the same reason. Even in a thought experiment, we can't forgive the way he snowed the country into believing there was some connection between Iraq and the Sept. 11 attacks; nor can we forget the way he hyped the flawed intelligence about weapons of mass destruction -- we're being generous here, not stupid. But let's assume that however calculated and cynical the machinations, and however wrongheaded the decision to go to war, the underlying motive was purely to avoid another catastrophic terrorist attack.

All right: Given these overly kind assumptions, can this administration's usurpation of power somehow be justified?

Every time I work it through, the answer I come up with is no. The president has no right to ignore the rule of law as if it were a mere nuisance.
i cum up with the verr same anser.

nuther pundit i add mire is H.D.S. Greenway out of the boston globe. he has a goodn today name of How will the Iraq war end?:
It is not that there is no progress being made in Iraq. There is. But the question is, as it was in Vietnam: What does this progress mean for our ultimate goals? In Vietnam it became all to clear that no matter how many wells we dug or schools we built, there would be Vietnamese who might drink from the wells and accept the schools, but remain adamantly opposed to Americans in their country.

The same strikes me as true in Iraq. It is perfectly logical for an Iraqi to have opposed Saddam yesterday and oppose us today. As nationalism became our adversary in Vietnam, more so than communism, so is nationalism in Iraq growing against us.
finely, frum the world of grate pundits, ye gut Frank Rich, witch he writ a articull name of I Saw Jackie Mason Kissing Santa Claus bout that silly war to deefend chrismus agin folk who wuznt makin no war agin it:
THE good news today is that the great 2005 war on Christmas, the conflagration that launched a thousand op-ed pieces and nearly as many battles on Fox News, is now officially over. And yes, Virginia - Christmas won!

Secularists, Jews, mainline Protestants and all the other grinches failed utterly to take Kriss Kringle down. Except at those megachurches that canceled services today rather than impede their flocks' giving and gorging, Christmas is alive and well everywhere in America. Last night NBC even rolled the dice and broadcast "It's a Wonderful Life" in prime time. With courage reminiscent of Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn's defiance of Stalin, the network steadfastly refused to redub the final scene's cries of "Merry Christmas!" with the godless "Happy holidays!"

As Michelle Goldberg wrote last month in her definitive debunking for Salon, there was in fact no war on Christmas, but rather "a burgeoning myth of a war on Christmas." Most of the grievances cited by Christmas's whiniest protectors - red and green banned from residents' wardrobes in Michigan, "Silent Night" censored in Wisconsin - were either anomalous idiocies or suburban legends. The calls for boycotts against chain stores with heathen holiday trees lost their zing when it turned out that even George and Laura Bush's Christmas card had called for a happy "holiday season."

But like every other chapter of irrational hysteria in America's cultural history, from the burning of "witches" in colonial Salem to the panic induced by Orson Welles's radio broadcast of the fictional "War of the Worlds" on the eve of World War II, the fake war on Christmas was not without its hidden meanings. Or not so hidden. If you worked at Fox News, wouldn't you want to change the subject from the war in Iraq to a war in which victory is a slam-dunk?
ifn i ever grow up, i hope to becum a pundit as good as these three.

Monday, December 26, 2005

revues of buddy don: ipod n itunes – wow

miz bd gut me one of them ipods that most everbidy up in here round new york city had dun alreddy gut em cetptn me. i had tride me a em pee 3 player name of archos, but twuznt verr good on a counta how ye had to rebild its operatin system nigh onto ever week ye used it. so i quit a'usin it.

thang is me n miz bd has notissd how we dont hardly ever listn to no musick no more. we did rip all our musick frum thar cee dees onto my hard drive, witch thay wuz rite near 9 thousund songs on thar, but we still dint listn to much musick on a counta twuz too hard to figger out how to git whut we wonted. we wood make playlists n such, but we couldnt git a random settin on windows media player that we lacked.

so whenever i putt that itunes program on my cumputer, twuz a revalayshun, speshly how all them 9 thousund songs kin be tucked rite inside that lil ipod without makin it bust. the ipod thangy n itunes bof gut em grate ways of organizin yer musick by genre or album or artist or playlist or faverts or recent playd, witch so duz wma, but thisn wurks a hole lot better, sorts quicker n makes it much easier to play random thru inny category.


whut spooks me is that thar party shuffle they gut. how kin it figger out witch musick me n miz bd lacks to here?

i know thar keepin records on our acktivities, witch thats a feachur of it. tiz rite simple to see witch tunes has been played n witchns hadnt or ye kin check witch songs ye dun listned to the most or witch ye rated highest n such.

but we aint hardly had no chants to listn to much of nuthin yet, so how could that party shuffle figger out whut we wood lack to here?

tiz sum skeery software ... but i lack it!


we also gut a 5-cd set of johnny cash name of unearthed n we couldnt quit till we had dun herd the hole thang.


i had herd that the battry wudnt no account on them ipods, witch i used that fer a eggscuse not to git one fer quite a spell. i tested it furst thang. tuck about 2 hours to git it charged up n then i run it till twuz plum tuckerd out, witch that tuck about fifteen hours of steddy playin.

as ye probly know ye charge it at yer cumputer so i plugged it in this mornin whenever i seen twuz about to quit on me. tuck a lil over a hour to git it all charged back up.

tiz amazin how this one lil piece of tecknowlogy changes everthang bout our relayshunship with musick. we kin cart our hole colleckshun with us wharever we go. in the car, at a friends, at home.


n when i take that ipod to wurk, miz bd kin listn to itunes n have the same servus only not portabull.

i kin see why everbidy had em one. i figgerd twuz a'gone be lack a walkman only with em pee 3s, but turnt out to be much more. i dint have no idee till now. i dont even know ifn i will be cee dees no more on a counta how ye kin downlode whutever ye wont fer a better price n git it rite now.


thankee, miz bd!


Sunday, December 25, 2005

holydays of buddy don: chrismus

we had us a feast n eggschanged presents las nite over to vaclav n jacks, witch jacks miz bds furstborn son n vaclav is our son-out-law. we had us a czech style chrismus on a counta vaclav bein host, witch that meant after we et we had to wait fer baby jesus (jezisek) to show up n brang even more presents.

heres hopin yer chrismus is as nice as ourn has been, witch it has been as rich n sweet as these here czech cookies, witch vaclav baked em n give em to us.

czech cookies:

Friday, December 23, 2005

pinions of buddy don: patriot or partisan?

we are livin in verr innerestin times, gittin a chants to see ifn amurka kin live up to its ideals, them cuntained n the constitushun. jes to reemind ye of sum of the thangs that orta apply to this situwayshun.

furst, here is the oath of offus frum articull 2, seckshun 1 of the constitushun mr bush swore to uphold:
I do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will faithfully execute the office of President of the United States, and will to the best of my ability, preserve, protect, and defend the Constitution of the United States.
next, here is the 4th amendment to the constitushun:
The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no Warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by Oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized.
i wood bleeve the uproar over the presdint aproovin nsa eavesdroppin on amurkins wuz partisan (n not the ack of true patriots) ifn:
  • the new york times, witch they printed the articull that got this hole scandal a brewin, had printed it last year when it mite could have affected the eleckshun sted of waitin fer a year (dont know the timin of it eggzackly or whuther twood have been before the eleckshun, but twooda been close)

  • it dint involve publicans lack arlen spencer gittin upset by it
as the wall street journal reports, this thang has split the presdints own party, witch that makes me thank thays sum patriots amung the publicans that wood putt thar cuntry ahed of thar party:
WASHINGTON -- President Bush's claim that he has a legal right to eavesdrop on some U.S. citizens without court approval has widened an ideological gap within his party.

On one side is the national-security camp, made even more numerous by loyalty to a wartime president. On the other are the small-government civil libertarians who have long held a privileged place within the Republican Party but whose ranks have ebbed since the 2001 terrorist attacks.

The surveillance furor, at least among some conservatives, also has heightened worries that the party is straying from many of its core principles the longer it remains in control of both the White House and Congress.

Conservatives have knocked heads in recent months over the administration's detainment and treatment of terrorist suspects, and as recently as yesterday over provisions of the Patriot Act. Strains also have grown among conservatives over government spending and whether to loosen U.S. immigration rules.

But the current debate over using the National Security Agency for domestic surveillance -- which the administration has defended as legal and necessary -- hit a rawer nerve because it pits national-security concerns against a core constitutional right, in this case, the Fourth Amendment right against unreasonable searches and seizures.
tiz hard to know bout thisn on a counta how we dont know much of nuthin bout top secret programs. ifn twuz a program that captchurs all communicayshuns twixt amurkins n folks usin fones overseas, as the boston globe reported this morning, then tiz sumthin that rubs mos ever amurkin the rong way:
WASHINGTON -- The National Security Agency, in carrying out President Bush's order to intercept the international phone calls and e-mails of Americans suspected of links to Al Qaeda, has probably been using computers to monitor all other Americans' international communications as well, according to specialists familiar with the workings of the NSA.

The Bush administration and the NSA have declined to provide details about the program the president authorized in 2001, but specialists said the agency serves as a vast data collection and sorting operation. It captures reams of data from satellites, fiberoptic lines, and Internet switching stations, and then uses a computer to check for names, numbers, and words that have been identified as suspicious.

"The whole idea of the NSA is intercepting huge streams of communications, taking in 2 million pieces of communications an hour," said James Bamford, the author of two books on the NSA, who was the first to reveal the inner workings of the secret agency.

"They have a capacity to listen to every overseas phone call," said Tom Blanton, director of the National Security Archive at George Washington University, which has obtained documents about the NSA using Freedom of Information Act requests.
The NSA's system of monitoring e-mails and phone calls to check for search terms has been used for decades overseas, where the Constitution's prohibition on unreasonable searches does not apply, declassified records have shown.
ifn twuz the case, then tiz a skeery thang on a counta the follerin simple but easy possibilities:
  • a mama talkin to a child overseas a'studyin on a skolarship could git into a discusshun of whut folks thanks of amurka in the cuntry whar the child is a'studyin n mentchun sum of them terms that wood alert the computer n make folks thank mayhap tiz a suspishus conversayshun

  • sumbidy could git a call frum a ackshul agent of al qaeda that wudnt nuthin but a rong number, witch we have dun seen that once ye are a suspeck, seems lack they kin do innythang they wonta with ye.
so these days is the kinda times that tries mens souls.

ye mite have dun herd partisans argue that tiz ok ifn clinton did it. thatn has been debunked, but the plane fack is, it dont matter ifn clinton broke the law the same way – that still dont give nobidy the rite to brake the law. i caint git off a murder charge by sayin other folks has dun it n gut away with it.

sum partisans claim that congress dun give bush the rite to do bout innnythang he wonts to do whenever they approoved his use of force to git osama n them that ackshly attacked us on 9/11, witch as ye mite coulda notissd, he aint been able to catch osama after all these years (tiz a longer time than it tuck us to defeat bof them nazis n japanese durin worl war two). but former sd senator daschle dun proovd that wudnt so:
On the evening of Sept. 12, 2001, the White House proposed that Congress authorize the use of military force to "deter and pre-empt any future acts of terrorism or aggression against the United States." Believing the scope of this language was too broad and ill defined, Congress chose instead, on Sept. 14, to authorize "all necessary and appropriate force against those nations, organizations or persons [the president] determines planned, authorized, committed or aided" the attacks of Sept. 11. With this language, Congress denied the president the more expansive authority he sought and insisted that his authority be used specifically against Osama bin Laden and al Qaeda.

Just before the Senate acted on this compromise resolution, the White House sought one last change. Literally minutes before the Senate cast its vote, the administration sought to add the words "in the United States and" after "appropriate force" in the agreed-upon text. This last-minute change would have given the president broad authority to exercise expansive powers not just overseas -- where we all understood he wanted authority to act -- but right here in the United States, potentially against American citizens. I could see no justification for Congress to accede to this extraordinary request for additional authority. I refused.
tiz time to divide the sheep frum the goats, so to speak, ceptn in this case, tiz the patriots frum the partisans.

the patriots will not sit still fer this without a investigayshun. the partisans is a'gone try to stop it n perteck thar own.

ifn whut mr bush is a'doon is legal, then the investigayshun wont hurt im. ifn taint, then hes in big truble fer failin to uphold the oath he swore to uphold.

tiz that simple.

rite now, usin this simple method, ye kin tell that arlen specter is a patriot on thisn (n i half to add mitt, i aint no big fan of senator specters). them that thanks tiz rong to investigate this cumpletely is folks that putts party above cuntry, witch thar partisans, not patriots.

ye kin tell how subpeenas n investigayshuns is generly partisan by this:
Democrats on the committee said the panel issued 1,052 subpoenas to probe alleged misconduct by the Clinton administration and the Democratic Party between 1997 and 2002, at a cost of more than $35 million. By contrast, the committee under Davis has issued three subpoenas to the Bush administration, two to the Energy Department over nuclear waste disposal at Yucca Mountain, and one last week to the Defense Department over Katrina documents.
at this parlus time in our histry, we need leaders of courage that putts cuntry above party, meanin we need patriots not partisans.

Thursday, December 22, 2005

pomes of buddy don: They Hate Us For Our Freedoms

They Hate Us For Our Freedoms

They hate us for our freedoms as I'm sure you've heard us say –
So why not make them hate us less by taking some away?
Especially since by doing so, with luck we might detect
The dangerous among the very folks we must protect?
Trust us, we were guided by the very best intentions
So what if we defied some constitutional conventions?

The fact is we did nothing that should be called "malicious"
By spying on our citizens to see who is suspicious.
We needed to hear what was said whenever someone talked –
We would have asked to change the law but Congress might have balked!
And why should we reveal our hand to some top secret court
Whose judges might not understand this is no easy sport?

Our enemy is not a state – our war can have no end –
If civil rights are in the way, they'll simply have to bend!

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

pinions of buddy don: praze fer patriots

let us now praze sum partiots, witch fer me thays folks that putts thar cuntry n the princepills twuz founded on ahead of party or personull benefit.

heres a few thats deservin of menchun, furst four frum a articull bout the patriot ack:
  • John E. Sununu (publican frum new hampshire)
    Sununu, whose father was a New Hampshire governor and White House chief of staff to George H.W. Bush, took issue with Bush's ultimatum. "How can the president justify vetoing the [temporary] extension?"

    Sununu said. "That suggests that he thinks the country is better off without any Patriot Act provisions in place than with a three-month extension. And that makes no sense at all."
  • Lisa Murkowski (publican frum alaska)
    Asked about the president's remarks yesterday, Murkowski smiled and said softly, "I think the responsible thing to do at this point is to move forward with a three-month extension" of the current law. Murkowski, who inherited her seat from her father, said she has received angry phone calls and e-mails from non-Alaskans. "But I've got to listen to my constituents first," she said, and they have been "very supportive."
  • Chuck Hagel (publican frum nebraska)
    Hagel appears equally sanguine. "I took an oath of office to the Constitution, I didn't take an oath of office to my party or my president," he recently told reporters.
  • Larry E. Craig (publican frum Idaho)
    "The beauty of Westerners is that we have a healthy distrust of our government," he said, adding that gun owners are particularly leery of laws that give federal agents greater powers to secretly search offices and homes. "Whether they are business records or they are gun dealers' records or whatever, they are records that can be gained" under the law, Craig said.
  • Judge John E. Jones III, who bleeves tiz importunt to defend science
    The opinion written by Judge John E. Jones III in the Dover evolution trial is a two-in-one document that offers both philosophical and practical arguments against "intelligent design" likely to be useful to far more than a school board in a small Pennsylvania town.

    Jones gives a clear definition of science, and recounts how this vaunted mode of inquiry has evolved over the centuries. He describes how scientists go about the task of supporting or challenging ideas about the world of the senses -- all that can be observed and measured. And he reaches the unwavering conclusion that intelligent design is a religious idea, not a scientific one.

    His opinion is a passionate paean to science. But it is also a strategic defense of Darwinian theory.
  • U.S. District Judge James Robertson (frum FISA)
    A federal judge has resigned from the court that oversees government surveillance in intelligence cases in protest of President Bush's secret authorization of a domestic spying program, according to two sources.

    U.S. District Judge James Robertson, one of 11 members of the secret Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Court, sent a letter to Chief Justice John G. Roberts Jr. late Monday notifying him of his resignation without providing an explanation.

    Two associates familiar with his decision said yesterday that Robertson privately expressed deep concern that the warrantless surveillance program authorized by the president in 2001 was legally questionable and may have tainted the FISA court's work.
thanks n kudos to these fine patriots fer standin up fer the princepills on witch our cuntry wuz founded.

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

pinions of buddy don: winnin them harts n minds

whenever ye gut ye a war on a tacktick a'gone on lack we do – that thar war on terror – ye kin say mos innythang bout how to win, but thonly way to doot is to cunvints folks not to use the tacktick (terrorist acks).

ye gut to cunvints em that ye stand fer better values than yer enemies do.

ifn ye turn out to be wursern yer enemies, then them that wonts to attack kin use yer wurserness agin ye. they kin claim that thar attackin ye on a counta yer evil or willin to compromise yer own demockrussy or dont stand fer whut ye claim to stand fer.

as jesus putt it (matthew 7:15-20):
15 Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves.

16 Ye shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of thistles?

17 Even so every good tree bringeth forth good fruit; but a corrupt tree bringeth forth evil fruit.

18 A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither can a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit.

19 Every tree that bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down, and cast into the fire.

20 Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them.
so whut kinda fruit are we a'bearin? whut reasons are we givin them harts n minds fer wontin to cum over to our side? heres the list best i kin tell:
  • in our cuntry, ever citizen is innocent until prooved guilty the presdint thanks thar suspishus

  • in our cuntry, ifn ye git arrested, ye gut a rite to a speedy trial a chants fer a trial or military tribunal ceptn ifn the presdint thanks yer suspishus

  • in our cuntry, ifn ye git arrested, ye gut the rite to consult a lawyer (court appointed ifn ye caint git yer own) ye gut no rite to see a lawyer ifn the presdint thanks yer suspishus

  • in our cuntry, ifn ye git arrested, ye gut a rite to see the evidents agin ye ye mite could git to see the evidents agin ye ceptn ye caint ifn the presdint thanks yer suspishus

  • in our cuntry, ifn ye git arrested, ye gut a rite to be charged with sum kinda crime or let a'loose ye git to stay in prison indefinitely ifn the presdint thanks yer suspishus

  • in our cuntry, ifn ye git arrested, ye gut a rite to make a fone call to let them ye luvs know whuts happend to ye no need to let nobidy know nuthin bout ye nor bout whut mite coulda happend to ye ifn the presdint thanks yer suspishus

  • in our cuntry, ye gut the rite to be safe in yer own home frum bein searched without a warrnt to putt up with the fack that ye caint have liberty ifn the presdint thanks – fer yer own securty – ye mite need to have yer own home searched with no warrnt n no news that twuz dun ifn the presdint thanks yer suspishus

  • in our cuntry, ye gut the rite to talk to yer kids in skool oversears without wurryin bout no fedrul gummint tappin yer fone to face that fack that havin fullbrite n rhodes skolars amung yer kids mite could make ye suspishus, witch the presdint has dun splaind how hes gut the rite to do whutever he wonts to ifn the presdint thanks yer suspishus

  • in our cuntry, ye dont half to ackcept yer gummint kidnappin folks n sendin em to other cuntries sos they kin be tortchurd agressivly interrorgated ifn the presdint thanks thar suspishus
as ye kin see, we gut us sum verr fragrunt fruit a'growin frum our tree.

in other cuntries, ye gut dicktaters that thanks tiz ok to claim folks is guilty befor thar arrested, hold folks with no trial, hold em without showin em inny evidents of thar crime, hold em without accusin em of committin a crime, arrest folks with no evidents, putt folks in prison indefinitely, refuse to let em talk to thar lawyer, refuse to add mitt who ye dun arrested, refuse to let folks ye arrest have inny fone calls, refuse to let the famblies of them ye arrest know they been arrested, search thar homes without tellin em, kidnap suspishus folks, n even tortchur suspishus folks to find out whut they know.

as ye kin see, them thar harts n minds is bound to find our side much better on a counta ... uh, that is, on a counta ... our presdint dun tole us so! to thar! take that, osama dun ben fergutt saddam ben taliban zarakiri!

ifn ye doubt our presdint, he mite could thank yer suspishus, so be keerful!

Monday, December 19, 2005

pomes of buddy don: two vues

one vue
If we cannot violate
The constitution we defend,
How can we annhilate
The enemies who wish to end
Our liberty inviolate,
Our rule of law and not of men?

I am the president, you see,
The law's for others, not for me.
nuther vue
The Constitution is a piece of paper, after all.
You could frame a replica and hang it on your wall.
You could treat it as you would the relic of a saint
Could pray to it or worship it, there would be no complaint.

But if you are the president of these United States
You made an oath: article two, section one, clause eight.
From that there is no hint that you could be beyond its reach
Your charge is to defend it; if you don't, you get impeached.
i wunder witch vue will win? i know witchn orta.

Saturday, December 17, 2005

pinions of buddy don: sworn duty

the big story of the day – n i reckun thisn could be the biggest story of the year – is how bush sined orders lettin the nsa spy on us all.

spyin on amurkins by our own gummint without a warrant aint legal. period. ifn twuz dun, the law wuz broke. ifn the law wuz broke, sumbidy broke it n must be held to account.

even ifn tiz the presdint.

we are spozed to be a cuntry of laws, not men. that means aint no man, not even the presdint, that aint under the law. twuz one of the thangs we dint lack bout them kings of england whenever this cuntry wuz founded n tiz one of the most importunt points of demockrussy (aint that whut we are over in eye-rack trine to spread?).

thays three mane angles on that story.

the furstn is the fack that twuz dun atall. that means we gut to have a investigayshun n figger out whut happend when n whuther tiz even true. but seem lack twoodnt a gut this far ifn twernt alreddy purty much thar yet. ifn tiz true, then how kin thar not be a impeachment of the presdint fer violatin the constitushun he is sworn to uphold? i aint no lawyer n i aint gut no doubts that them sofists on the rite will splain why hes gut no restraints on im, but twood half to be sofistry on a counta tiz as black n white as it kin git. ifn he wonts that power, he kin ast fer it. but he caint take it without violatin our constitushun.

so thats a big a nuff story all by its ownself, josephine.

speshly since the secunt angle on the story is how them publicans is reacktin. furst articull i red on the topick (witch, i caint find it now!) mentchund arlen specter (r frum pa) furst amung all pall tishuns.

makes me wunder ifn arlen specter kin be the new howard baker, jr?

the nextn menchund twuz john mccain (r frum az). after that thay wuz a menchun of a dimcrat.

the point is, ifn this claim is true, ifn the presdint who swore to uphold the constitushun dun give orders to violate it, to brake the law, to spy on us, then even them publicans caint spin it away.

n ever publican with integrity knows it. i caint member that kinda thang happenin to mr bush since back in 2001 whenever he wuz allowd to move into the white house.

but the third angle is the one thats gut me wundern bout whar are the good guys in all this? on a counta the new york times waited a year befor they published whut they knew. fergive me fer bein a lil perplexd, but aint reportin the news the verr misshun of the new york times? aint thay spozed to warn us ifn they know our gummint is doin sumthin that is jes plane rong? aint that purt near bein a accompliss to the ack?

i half to add mitt, i dun cum to speck the gummint to make me wonta pull out my hair. but they gut power n that tends to corrupt em.

i larnt thatn the hard way: furst time i wuz old a nuff to vote, i pullt the lever fer nixon (1972, witch i tell a lil bout that time here). after that, i gut to whar i figgerd thonly way we kin be safe frum corrupt pall tishuns n even tyranny is ifn we are payin tenchun to ever enemy of the constitushun, forn or domestick.

we gut the cia n milltary n who knows who to watch out fer forn enemies, but who kin watch our fer domestick enemies, who kin hep us know whuts a'gone on?

it has to be our press. tiz thar job, thar own sworn duty. thats why i am more skeerd bout the times holdin the story fer a year than i am a'knowin the gumnint wuz a'spyin on us. i speck them pall tishuns to try thangs, but i wonta thank we kin trust the press.

i lack the new york times or wonta lack it as much as i used to before the judith millers n elizabeth bumillers n kit seelyes other such stenogruffers wuz let a'loose. i hope they cum up with sum kinda good eggsplainayshun on thisn. i wonta bleeve in em.

we need a grate press whenever the constitushun is threatend, witch that seems to be bout all the time. sumbidy has to shine the lite on inny acktivities of domestick enemies of our constitushun. ifn the new york times caint doot, who kin?

Friday, December 16, 2005

blessins of buddy don: a current count

tiz time to count sum blessins, witch i gut moren innybidy outside of god kin count n i am livin proof that god continues to bless the undeservin. heres the current list of thangs thats wurthy:
  1. even the presdint of the united states sumtimes must half to stand nekkid, take 1

  2. even the presdint of the united states sumtimes must half to stand nekkid, take 2

  3. a nuther canary is warmin up to sang

  4. turns out our intelligents is better we thunk!

  5. our presidint is larnin to dance

  6. baby, it aint cold outside!

  7. thays a lot of profit to be made by sellin medicull deevices

  8. on a non-ironick note, eric over at strate white guy dun give me a book name of Complete Poetry of Robert Service, witch i hadnt never red too minny of his pomes n i am here to tell ye, tiz one of lifes grate playshures

  9. n last but not lease fer this list, the best wife in the worl, i gut a grate job, a muther in law that dun give me a coat that makes me proud everday when i go outside, sum groan kids thats a'gone cook a exter thanksgivin dinner fer us this weekend, a mama on the mend, n thay aint havin that strike over in new york city ... lease not yet.
as ye kin see, i gut a grate lifen i could go on n on n on countin blessins till them innernets wuz too full of my wurds to keep chuggin along.

have yerself a grate day, a wunderful weekend, n more blessins than ye could count yer ownself.

Thursday, December 15, 2005

ramblins of buddy don: aint gut no idees

i should feel loaded with idees fer bloggin, but i caint hardly git myself to keer. sum of the thangs i mite rite about ifn i had inny idees wood be the transit strike were lackly to have up in here. we been makin plans for who could git to wurk ifn thays a strike n who could wurk frum home ifn they caint git in. mayhap they kin settle, witch thay aint been no strike since 1980.

or i could rite bout a nuther comp season on wall street. spozedly tiz a good year fer it (ye kin find out by clickin the lank), but whut i have notissd is no matter how big them bonuses git, folks aint happy. fack is, the ones that gits the most is lack as not the ones thats a'gone cumplane the most. i tell my folks that seems to me lack inny bonus gratern zero is wurthy of thanks n a countin of the blessins. taint everbidy that gits one.

or i could wunder ifn taint the presdints duty to make shore them laws is obeyd. thats whut ben claims in eggsplainin gummint. the reason im a'wundern is that articull bout bob novak sayin he wood be amazed ifn the presdint dint know who betrayd our cuntry by leakin the fack that valerie plame wuz a covert agent.

or i reckon i could ast questchuns bout why the pentagon wood have a database with info on law-abidin u.s. citizens. war protests aint suspishus. thar part of bein a good amurkin.

mayhap i wood be wundern why the presdint wood skip attendin the white house conference on agin! woodnt it be better fer im to show up at his own confernce in sted of havin a foto opp with folks thats hand picked on acount of bleevin everthang he sez alreddy? shorely our presdint aint no coward, rite?

i mite wunder why our presdint had to give a medal of honor to the feller mos responsibull fer givin im bad intelligents that led to the war. even mr bush add mitts the infermayshun wuz bogus.

maybe i wood be glad our senate has deecided to ast fer informayshun on them secret prisons in europe that we dont have n even ifn we did, the infermayshun we gut frum tortchern probly saved european lives, ifn we had dun it, witch we aint add mittin nuthin.

but i aint gut no idees this mornin.

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

readin of buddy don: isaac asimov

i gut a good friend that runs a website name of thinking meat, witch ye kin see i dun putt it on my list of favert blogs a while ago. hes one of the smartest folks i know n even tho we live in differnt places, we talk often a nuff to make friends. it heps that we wurk together, so to speak. so mos everday we have a chat sesshun a'gone.

sumtime back he tole me one of his favert authors wuz isaac asimov. i been a fan of scifi fer years, but fer sum reason, whenever i furst tride readin asimov back in my junyer hi skool daze, i dint find it my cup of tea, so to speak.

sos ye kin judge my luv of the books im fixin to list, ye should know i tuck that test at the lank on scifi above n heres how it turnt out:

Which Fantasy/SciFi Character Are You?

in case yer curyas, i aint that purty nor that good by inny way ye could reckun it, but i do purty good on tests.

innywho, i finely deecided to dip my toe back into sum asimovian waters. i wuz partly moved by my friends good taste n brains, but whut really gut me goin wuz larnin that The Foundation Trilogy had beat out The Lord of the Rings for an award.

but whar do ye start ifn ye wonta git everthang that leads up to the novel name of Foundation? i started at I, Robot, witch thats a book of short stories. i wuznt all that impressd on a counta how it seemed lack the stories wuz logick games n the care acketers wuz not well drawn or deeveloped. but my friend sed fer me not to give up. lucky fer me, i dint!

heres the order ye orta use to read them books. i promiss, twood be one of the grate readin eggsperientses of yer life ifn ye go thru em all. i wish i could doot agin. when i git more time, i hope to rite a bit bout the flossofy asimov deevelops in them books. meanwhile, ye kin jes enjoy em!
  1. I, Robot (1950)
  2. The Caves of Steel (1954)
  3. The Naked Sun (1956)
  4. The Robots of Dawn (1983)
  5. Robots and Empire (1985)
  6. Pebble in the Sky (1950)
  7. The Stars Like Dust (1951)
  8. The Currents of Space (1952)
  9. Prelude to Foundation (1988)
  10. Forward the Foundation (1993)
  11. Foundation (1951)
  12. Foundation and Empire (1952)
  13. Second Foundation (1953)
  14. Foundation's Edge (1982)
  15. Foundation and Earth (1986)
whut a ride! i hope ye git a chants to take it.

Monday, December 12, 2005

pinions of buddy don: pandora n her box

thays a articull name of Tracing Iraq's Painful Arc, From the Past to the Future; A Professor's Life Is Bound in the Fortunes, Frustrations of His Country in todays washington post bout a perfesser in iraq. twuz writ by a feller name of anthony shadid n he tries to show how much of recent iraqi histry is illustrated by the life of a perfesser in baghdad. one of the perfessers best lines is '"The Americans have opened a Pandora's box," he said.' ye mite member bout pandoras box. twuz the ruff equivalent of eves apple: once the box wuz open (or the apple wuz et), paradise wuz ended n all the ills we know of life wuz released. as ye know, once ye take the top offn that box ye caint putt in back on innymoren ye kin unbite that apple.

so whut ills do we find? most of em wuz thar befor, but the story went bout how we wuz a'gone make em better. so far, we still caint git the elecktricity to run as well, caint git clean water to wurk as well, caint restore securty n caint even stop all the tortchur, witch ye kin read bout how thats a'goin in a articull name of Abuse Cited In 2nd Jail Operated by Iraqi Ministry; Official Says 12 Prisoners Subjected to 'Severe Torture':
An Iraqi government search of a detention center in Baghdad operated by Interior Ministry special commandos found 13 prisoners who had suffered abuse serious enough to require medical treatment, U.S. and Iraqi officials said Sunday night.

An Iraqi official with firsthand knowledge of the search said that at least 12 of the 13 prisoners had been subjected to "severe torture," including sessions of electric shock and episodes that left them with broken bones.

"Two of them showed me their nails, and they were gone," the official said on condition of anonymity because of security concerns.
now that we are trine to walk a mile in saddams moccasins, have we larnt to do thangs inny better? i real eyes the questchun is cunsidderd rong to ast, but ye gut to wonder sooner or later whuter tiz possibull to brang the kind of life we lack to folks that lacks a nuther kind.

nuther thang i half to wunder is whuther we kin do good based on deecepshun n lies. no matter how minny folks tride to splain that thay wuznt no evidents to claim saddam wuz a'wurkin together with ('had ties to' or 'was training' al qaeda) or that them iraqis had innythang to do with 9/11 (they dint -- twuz 15 saudis, one frum lebanon, one fum egypt n two frum the united arab emirates) or even that saddam wuz trine to 'purchase significant quantities of uranium from Africa,' as twuz sed in a recent state of the union address, no matter how much evidents agin the case fer war wuz presented, the case fer war wuz made on them same bogus claims. we git futher proof of that today in a la times articull name of French Told CIA of Bogus Intelligence; The foreign spy service warned the U.S. various times before the war that there was no proof Iraq sought uranium from Niger, ex-officials say:
More than a year before President Bush declared in his 2003 State of the Union speech that Iraq had tried to buy nuclear weapons material in Africa, the French spy service began repeatedly warning the CIA in secret communications that there was no evidence to support the allegation.

The previously undisclosed exchanges between the U.S. and the French, described in interviews last week by the retired chief of the French counterintelligence service and a former CIA official, came on separate occasions in 2001 and 2002.
so ye gut to wunder: is it ok to deceive (or even lie) fer a good cause? sum mite wunder whut wood jesus do? the best hint i know of cums in the third chaptur of the book of romans:
5 But if our unrighteousness commend the righteousness of God, what shall we say? Is God unrighteous who taketh vengeance? (I speak as a man)

6 God forbid: for then how shall God judge the world?

7 For if the truth of God hath more abounded through my lie unto his glory; why yet am I also judged as a sinner?

8 And not rather, (as we be slanderously reported, and as some affirm that we say,) Let us do evil, that good may come? whose damnation is just.

9 What then? are we better than they? No, in no wise: for we have before proved both Jews and Gentiles, that they are all under sin;

10 As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one:

11 There is none that understandeth, there is none that seeketh after God.

12 They are all gone out of the way, they are together become unprofitable; there is none that doeth good, no, not one.

13 Their throat is an open sepulchre; with their tongues they have used deceit; the poison of asps is under their lips:

14 Whose mouth is full of cursing and bitterness:

15 Their feet are swift to shed blood:

16 Destruction and misery are in their ways:

17 And the way of peace have they not known:

18 There is no fear of God before their eyes.
i kin understand lots of thangs that dont seem to make much sense – how ye kin use a equayshu lack i = i + 1, fer instunts – but i caint understand how spozedly good christchun folk kin support the invayshun of iraq or the deceptshuns (lies) used to justify it or the evil bein dun in our name with the hope thangs will cum out good. we used to cundem them communists fer claimin that the ends justify the means.

have we becum whut we hate?

Saturday, December 10, 2005

life of buddy don, chapter 141: thonly white man in heaven

dr streeter wuz as good as his wurd bout gittin me sum pay. twuznt whut i wuz spozed to git ifn i wuznt temporairy full time, witch i wuz gittin 30 cents on the dollar, so i swore i wood do whutever it tuck to git on the reglar full time payroll. my method wuz to volunteer, but twuznt only fer the skool of hard knox theatricull players. i vounteerd fer servul other thangs besides that.

furst thangs furst, tho, n that wood be that thar drama club. furst time we met wuz on a saturdy afternoon, witch twuz a bit of a sprize to walk thru that nayborhood in the middle of the day n see how nice everthang looked. i generly cum by so early in the mornin that i couldnt hardly see nuthin but twuz a sunny cold day n seem lack them projects wuz jes shinin, everthang as clean as could be.

even tho twuz cold, by time i had walked halfway to skool, i wuz generly too hot to keep my coat buttond or my scarf rapped round my neck. that wuz sumthin i went thru everday, gittin all bundled up n steppin out onto 17th street n findin myself near shivern, but i wood be brakin out in sweat by time i gut to skool.

the meetin wuz fer 2 pm, so i deecided to git thar a lil early n mark a few papers whilst i wuz a'waitin fer the meetin to cummence. i half to add mitt i wuz a lil nervus bout it fer reasons i caint ritely splain. whenever thay wuz class to teach, thay wudnt nuthin to be nervus bout since i wuz the perfesser n gut to say how thangs wuz a'gone be. but this time i wuz jes one of the folks cummin to the meetin. i knew i dint hardly know nuthin bout drama, lease not doin it on stage tho i had red a minny a play n seen a few. but thang wuz, sum of them students probly knew lots more bout theeater than i dun.

two o'clock cum n went without nobidy showin up. i deecided to check tuther rooms, a'wundern did i git the place rong. then i wunderd wuz it the time. but long bout 2:30, here cum a feller name of william wilson, witch he wuz a senyer that i had dun herd of but never met. folks calld im willy will n made jokes playin with his name, mayhap on a counta him bein such a serious feller. he had run fer skool presdent n lost. sharon worth had splaind to me how he dint have no chants on a counta bein a alpha n wuznt no way no alpha wood beat a q. i ast her to splain but she jes laffd n tole everbidy i dint even know whut a q wuz.

innywho, willy cum rite up to me n shuck my hand n sed, 'william wilson.' i anserd back, 'buddy don duncan.' he sed he had herd bout me but i couldnt tell ifn that wuz a good thang or a bad. seem lack he wuz a lil angry bout sumthin, witch i cum to find out later on that wuz jes his way. i ast whar wuz everbidy? n he laffed n sed they wuz runnin on cee pee time. i tole im hadnt never herd of that time zone n could he splain it? he splaind bout cee pee time bein colord people time. i sed, 'colord people time?' n he sed, 'yeah. thats whatever time we shuffle on in.'

lack i sed, he had a angry look to im n i figgerd i had made im a lil angry to whar i wonted to pall gize. seem lack he wuz playin on whut he speckted my prejudgments to be. i had gut my mouth open with sorry wurds in it but befor i could let one out, here cum wanda joyce frum the addministrayshun. 'hey willy,' she sed with her hand in the air, witch he slapped it. twuz bout the time when hi fivin wuz brakin out all over but that wuz the furst time i seen innybidy doot.

while they wuz a'doin that, i tuck a quick look at my watch, witch wanda caught me a'doon it n splaind that the meetin wuz fer two but twood be run on cee pee time. i looked at willy, witch he smiled n sed, 'we just hope everyone shows up. no point watching the clock.'

that seemd to be the flossofy n i wuz sprized by how warm a thang twuz. by 3 o'clock thay wuz a roomfull n then in cum a cuple older folks, witch turnt out they wuz the guest die-recktors. one of em wuz a short feller with verr dark skin. he cum rite up to me as ifn i wuz in charge, stuck out his hand fer me to shake n sed, 'augustus trent. call me gus.' i anserd, 'buddy don duncan.' befor i could say much else sum feller called out, 'we call him mr d.' i looked roun to see who twuz but even tho that room wuz a'gittin warm frum all the kids that wuz thar, i dint see nary a one of my students. the woman wuz a lil taller n verr purty. gus innerduced her as janine toney.

seem lack dint nobidy know who wuz in charge whenever wanda ast me did i wonta say a few wurds to git us a'goin? i dint, but i figgerd twernt no time to cumplain, so i sed how twuz grate we had such a fine turnout n how we had us sum good local talent cum in to die-reck the play, witch rite thar wanda tuck the floor n splaind how thay wood be two plays, douglas turner ward's day of absence n a nuthern name of profiles in black.

soons she dun that, everbidy gut to findin seats or standin round, leavin wanda n gus n janine standin in the center of the circle. i had tuck a seat my ownself on a counta havin no idee whut we wuz a'gone do. but wanda had it all under cuntrol n gut rite to wurk splainin bout them two plays, witch quick as she dun it, she wuz innerupted by gus. i figgerd he wuz a'gone be the leader by then, but quick as he splaind his idee fer profiles in black, he turnd to janine n splaind how she wuz a'gone die reck a grate play frum one of amurkas bes playwrights, witch i wuz a lil sprized on a counta i hadnt never herd of no douglas turner ward befor.

not knowin nobidy or even knowin bout that grate playwright or bout much of nuthin havin to do with the thee-ater lef me wundern whut i wuz a'doon thar. i kindly wishd i hadnt cum out n wunderd whut could i do when i felt sumbidy tuggin on my sleeve n astin wood i move over on the bench to whar she could git a seat.

i turnt n wuz sprized to see cassandra worthy. we hadnt spoke atall since i made her mad by tellin her how emily wonted to meet her, so twuz nice that she wuz bein friendly. turnt out she dint know nobidy verr well ceptn me.

gus n janine tuck turns splainin thar plays. janine wonted to know ifn innybidy could git sum copyin dun since we wood need copies of the play. i menchuned how i had a friend that sold copiers n i wood ast him ifn he could do us the favor, witch that wuz billy stewart n that verr nex fridy at when the group met, we all made n bound copies a nuff fer everbidy includin wanda n me. i dint need nobidy to tell me thay wuznt no place on campus to make them copies.

then gus gut to splainin his. turnt out the play he wonted to do wuznt all made up yet. he needed folks to do a lil research, to find sum speeches by grate black amurkins, witch the idee wuz we wood have twelve of em n each one wood say a bit of a speech n we wood end by sangin. nary a student volunteerd to do no research, so i sed i wood brang sum books by them grate amurkins we wuz a'gone be preesentin, witch i had dun been a'usin em in my class fer dicktayshun. fer sum reason, my offer seemd to rile im a lil. i hadnt barely gut the wurds out till he talked rite on top of me, witch i shut up to listn.

'we will present our speakers with the dignity they deserve,' gus sed, 'then we will gather together to sign young, gifted n black n lift every voice.' why dont we close by sangin it now. then iris chambers started to hum n everbidy but me n cassandra worthy started hummin the same note n then all stood up n held hands with thar naybors n tuck to sangin a beeyootiful song i hadnt never herd befor, witch twuz lift every voice and sing, also known as the negro nashunull anthem. corse, i had cassandra in one hand n a feller name of rufus boudreau in tuther. i dint know a sangle wurd of that song n felt a lil shamed, but i noticed how cassandra dint sang neethur n that made me feel a lil better.

soon as that song wuz over, wanda tuck over n sed thay wood be reehearsals ever nite nex week ceptn fridy even if all we could do wuz sang till we gut our scripts. then she thanked us all fer cummin. everbidy but wanda, gus, janine n me disappeard. then gus n wanda tuck time to tell me how nice it wuz that i wood cum out, witch i could tell whut they ment wuz how i wuz white n why wood i be a'doin this? they gut to pall gizin bout cee pee time n tole me i had better larn to set my watch by it, witch they laffd n i laffd along with em.

then wanda looked at me as ifn thay wuz sumthin on my face n ast me did i feel nervus. i allowed as how i did, lease a lil bit, but only on a counta bein with a bunch of folks i dint know verr well n not bein a eggspurt in drama n not knowin the wurds to lift every voice n fer that matter not even knowin thay wuz such a thang as a negro nashunull anthem. but she meant did i feel nervus bout bein thonly white man in a bunch of black folk. i jes laffd n sed i had dun gut over that fall quarter. besides, twuz a verr warm bunch of folk.

once it gut home, i started lookin thru my books. i needed speeches frum the followin folks:
  1. Harriet Tubman
  2. Frederick Douglass
  3. Sojourner Truth
  4. W.E.B. Dubois
  5. Mary McLeod Bethune
  6. Marcus Garvey
  7. Paul Robeson
  8. Fannie Lou Hamer
  9. Malcolm X
  10. Martin Luther King, Jr.
  11. Lorraine Hansberry
  12. Angela Davis
i gut all my books together n had speeches frum near everbidy but martin luther king, jr, witch that seemed lack a sprize since his 'i have a dream' speech wuz easy to find. emily lacked studyin in the graduwait liberry, so we went over thar n i gut to studyin up on how to git the speeches i wonted. i gut mlks speech purty quick n then tuck to lookin into sum of them otherns, trine to see ifn i could find better thangs. they had em a speech frum angela davis that i wuz havin truble findin, but turnt out to be a speech whar she wuz quotin a feller name of martin niemoller. but they deecided to use thatn innyhow.

i wuz so cawt up in it that i dint notice how twuz late sundy afternoon. i ast emily whuther she wuz reddy to go, witch she wuz past bein reddy, but i hadnt noticed. i needed to grade a slew of papers, so i figgerd once we gut home, thats jes whut i wood do. but emily ast me did i wonta go back into the bedroom fer a lil sparkin, witch thats a offer i dint never refuse, so purty soon thar wuz a trail of emilys cloze -- all but the flannel shirt n knee socks -- leadin to the bed whar she wuz a'lyin on her back with that look on her face. i give her a lil kiss or two, but jes as thangs wuz a'gittin a'goin, the fone rung.

mayhap i shouldnta paid it no mind, but twudnt sumthin i could do that easy so i tuck it n wuz sprized whenever twuz dr morgans wife a'callin me back. emily wonted to know who twuz n whenever i tole her, she gut to twitchin lack she wuz half mad. but that call wuz importunt n kep me distracted. miz morgan -- 'call me ophelia' -- wuz agreein to cum over to knoxvull collidge to do sum deebates we wuz holdin fer black histry munth. i had volunteerd to git sum folks frum utk to cum over fer that eevent n nex thang ye know, i wuz spozed to moderate the deebate.

i gut offn that fone feelin grate. twuz a big releaf to git speakers fer my panel. i had been wurried how i wuz a'gone git everthang dun, but once i had my panel, it all fell rite into place. i went to git my notebook n make a few notes fer the week a'cummin up. mayhap i gut a lil carrd away on a counta how i fergut all bout emily till i herd her cum out of the shower.

'what did miz morgan want?' she ast.

i dint real eyes till then how i hadnt sed a wurd bout it to emily n how could she know i jes happend by luck to run into miz morgan or ophelia that is when i wuz a'lookin to find dr green? so i had ast her could she participate n she wuz deelited but had to check her skedule n git back to me. turnt out she could make it bof nites we wuz havin them deebates. i couldnt hep bein a lil eggcited n i half wonted to thank her fer havin dr morgan fer her major perfessor, but she had them wurry lines on her face. i wunderd whut wuz rong? she sed ifn i dint know, thay wudnt no point in a'tellin me. tiz the wurst possbull anser to that questchun on a counta why wood i ast ifn i dun alreddy knew?

i dint wonta fuss n fite over it, so i went to bed. that nex week wuz so busy i dint hardly see emily even once. but i half to add mitt i dint miss her much. i wuz too busy. besides, seem lack ever other day sumbidy wuz treatin me lack i wuz a lil prince on a counta i wuz willin to cum out after dark on the black side of town. willy will insisted on givin me a ride near everwhar. them deebates went well n i larnt a lot. we reehearsed ever nite n i had duble duty them nites we had them deebates.

on thursdy we had us a dress reehearsal n a lil celebrayshun. they had it over at austin east hi skool i wuz ridin with willy n a carfull of kids n we wuz a lil late. as we wuz a'walkin in to the basketball arena, a feller name of clayton edwards ast me why i wuz thar. he sed it lack he couldnt figger whut wuz in it fer me. i dint hardly know whut to say. i splaind how i had made a commitment n had to keep up with it, how i wuz larnin more frum my job than i had dun frum graduwait skool. he sed he knew that, but i coulda stayd home that last nite.

i wuz bout to say sumthin bout how i wonted to be thar when i wuz sprized to here cassandra tellin clayton to leave me alone. when he ast her why, she splaind how i wuz a'gone be thonly white man in heaven. i hadnt give much thought to whuther i wonted to be thar or not befor that. fack is, i wuz jes trine to git on dr streeters good side. but whenever i herd cassandra say i wuz thonly white man in heaven, i felt lack i wuz eggzackly that. i real eyesed then that however much i mite thank i wuz doin good fer the sake of doin good, twuz as much vanity as innythang.

fack is, i wudnt livin nowhar but rite on earth, witch that verr nex sundy, i gut a reeminder when emily wonted me to putt down a pile of papers i wuz gradin sos we could go back into the bedroom. she had dun shagged her cloze by the time i gut back thar, but this time thay woodnt be no sparkin. she wonted to talk. about us.

Friday, December 09, 2005

pinions of buddy don: ramblin after a nite out

me n miz bd had a good time last nite. mr red molly wuz in town so we gut together fer dinner at saint andrews. twuz verr nice to see im agin n talk bout good food n sangle malt scotch n the IT bizness n such. we sent our greetins to red n walked im to the port authorty, witch thats whar we wuz a'gone our ownself.

thankee fer a fine time, sir!

meanwhile, back in the world:

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

feasts et by buddy don: fried turky

i half to add mitt i been feelin lazy here lately, witch thats partly why i aint been bloggin. i had five days left to take fer vacayshun n tuck em this week sos my boss could go home to the uk fer christmus.

but i been meanin to blog a lil bout this amazin thanksgivin dinner me n miz bd wuz privliged to eat at her bruthers. me n miz bd gone to ohio after visitin tennessee n cummin back sos she could take sum classes (busy busy bees wuz we). we stayd with her mama in beavercreek, witch we always have a nice visit with her n hadnt been fer way too long.

but thanksgivin wuz to be at her bruthers place so we drove up in anticipayshun of a feast. we had dun herd minny a tale bout his fried turky. i hadnt never seen one fried thataway n i wonted to git a idee how twuz dun so i tuck my camera. the result wuz truly the best turky i ever et.

heres his setup:

as ye kin see, thays the propane cannystir with its fires a'burnin under that tub of grease. he splaind how he takes his turky n measures it in water furst sos he knows how much grease hes a'gone need.

here's the furst turky, witch he made two of em n coverd the furstn on the outside with a bunch of seasonins:

that grease wuz verr hot – 350 deegrees – sos it putt up quite a fuss:

boilin grease!

52 mints later, that 13-pound turky cum out a beeyootifull shade of black:

he dint putt no seasonin on the skin of tuther turky, witch as ye kin see, it cum out more golden brown (but thay both tasted grate):

that turky wuz the joosiest i ever et. fack is, twuz so good that folks et bout half the furst turky while twuz bein cut up. ye mite coulda thought twuz a pride of lions eatin! this here pitchers shows ye why:

twuz a verr nice event with more food than we coulda et in three days. we watched a lil football n tuck sum pitchers n had sum fine conversashun. i tuck sum of that turky with me to eat on the way home.


Friday, December 02, 2005

pitchers tuck by buddy don: cupla thangs

this heres a pitcher me n miz bd tuck in tennessee. we uploded it to a laptop n showd it to mama, witch she dint wont git up frum her bed. we tole her twoodnt be but mayhap tweny paces outside her frunt door to see that moon. she tuck the bait n twuz the furst time she had been outdoors since she gut back frum las vegas, witch she lost her gall bladder thar.

aint it time fer a new mornin? heres hopin that stories lack this mean ones a'cummin:
  • Justice Staff Saw Texas Districting As Illegal; Voting Rights Finding On Map Pushed by DeLay Was Overruled
    Justice Department lawyers concluded that the landmark Texas congressional redistricting plan spearheaded by Rep. Tom DeLay (R) violated the Voting Rights Act, according to a previously undisclosed memo obtained by The Washington Post. But senior officials overruled them and approved the plan.

    The memo, unanimously endorsed by six lawyers and two analysts in the department's voting section, said the redistricting plan illegally diluted black and Hispanic voting power in two congressional districts. It also said the plan eliminated several other districts in which minorities had a substantial, though not necessarily decisive, influence in elections.

    "The State of Texas has not met its burden in showing that the proposed congressional redistricting plan does not have a discriminatory effect," the memo concluded.

    The memo also found that Republican lawmakers and state officials who helped craft the proposal were aware it posed a high risk of being ruled discriminatory compared with other options.

    But the Texas legislature proceeded with the new map anyway because it would maximize the number of Republican federal lawmakers in the state, the memo said. The redistricting was approved in 2003, and Texas Republicans gained five seats in the U.S. House in the 2004 elections, solidifying GOP control of Congress.
  • Business As Usual: Corrupt
    It used to be said that the moral arc of a Washington career could be divided into four parts: idealism, pragmatism, ambition and corruption. You arrive with a passion for a cause, determined to challenge the system. Then you learn to work for your cause within the system. Then rising in the system becomes your cause. Then, finally, you exploit the system -- your connections in it, and your understanding of it -- for personal profit.

    And it remains true, sort of, but faster. Even the appalling Jack Abramoff had ideals at one point. But he took a shortcut straight to corruption. On the other hand, you can now trace the traditional moral arc in the life of conservative-dominated Washington itself, which began with Ronald Reagan's inauguration and marks its 25th anniversary in January. Reagan and Co. arrived to tear down the government and make Washington irrelevant. Now the airport and a giant warehouse of bureaucrats are named after him.

    By the 20th anniversary of their arrival, when an intellectually corrupt Supreme Court ruling gave them complete control of the government at last, the conservatives had lost any stomach for tearing it down. George W. Bush's "compassionate conservatism" was more like an apology than an ideology. Meanwhile, Tom DeLay -- the real boss in Congress -- openly warned K Street that unless all the choice lobbying jobs went to Republicans, lobbyists could not expect to have any influence with the Republican Congress. This warning would be meaningless, of course, unless the opposite was also true: If you hire Republican lobbyists, you and they will have influence over Congress. And darned if DeLay didn't turn out to be exactly right about this.

    No prominent Republican upbraided DeLay for his open invitation to bribery. And bribery is what it is: not just campaign contributions but the promise of personal enrichment for politicians and political aides who play ball for a few years before cashing in.
i half to add mitt, i am a'hopin tiz a new dawn fer us, a chants to git back to our eye-deals agin, a sunrise as purty as thisn, witch ye kin click on it to make it bigger:

Thursday, December 01, 2005

pomes of buddy don: How good it felt

How good it felt

How good it felt when on the Lincoln's deck
Our leader proclaimed major combat done
The right wing had the left wing by the neck –
The war against the liberals was won!

The mission was accomplished, glory be!
Approval ratings in the stratosphere –
We saw that statue fall on our tv –
The rose-petaled parades would soon be here!

But then things rotted like old orange rinds
As facts betrayed us with their noxious ooze
How can we win a war for hearts and minds
If we cannot control the Daily News?

What can we do? The truth smells worse than poop
So change the facts! Send in the Lincoln Group!