Saturday, August 02, 2003

life of buddy don, chaptur 30:
lawsy day

as ye git older one of the main thangs ye member bout folks is thar sayins. this is speshly true bout yer relativs on a counta ye wood here em usin sayins whenever ye wuz too lil to know that sayins wuz whut they wuz. ye mite coulda thought they wuz jes talk.

then later on in life long cums one of them sayins to remind ye of sumbidy.

grandie, fer instunts. she used to sit out under the shade tree on a hot day sippin ice tea while we wuz a'playin in the yard. n ever now n agin she wood sigh n say 'lawsy day.' n whenever she wuz furst a'sayin it, i couldnt thank why.

then the first nite i spent in the house in kingston, after eli n brew had finely lef, i wuz sprized to here myself heave up a big ole sigh n say 'lawsy day.' n that made me thank bout grandie n wunder how twood have made her feel to know i wuz deevorcin frum darlene.

corse the furst nite i wuz thar, twernt lack our plan wuz that we wuz deevorcin. leest that wernt the way we splained it.

twuz summer in 1974 n heres the logick of the argumint darlene n me wuz makin. she wuz about to be a senyur in collidge. i wuz still plannin on goin to roane state in the fall. twuz a hardship on me havin to drive so far. magine how easy twood be if i wuz livin in kingston n she wuz livin in a dorm. jes fer her senyur year. and besides, n we had us a open marrg. i thank ye git the drift.

mama wood say 'bewar of whut ye wont' n she mint ye wuz a'fixin to git it. whenever i wuz lil, seem lack she wuz a sayin 'bewar of whut ye wont' on a counta i wuz actin up n astin fer a whippin. then whenever i tole her bout wontin to see places n do thangs, she wood say 'bewar of whut ye wont' n then it seemed lack a good thang, lack she wuz a promisin me my dreams wuz a'gone cum true.

then later on, darlene n me, we hatched us that plan on me a'movin to kingston n her to the dorms, and i caint lie bout how twuz. thay wuz thangs i wuz a wontin even ifn they wernt thangs i wuz spozed to be a'havin. n one of em wuz gretchen, witch she n the other three gurls frum the farm cum over the nite after i had dun moved darlene into the dorm, witch i dint move till the next day. so ye mite could say i specktid thangs mite wurk out with gretchen n mayhap one them shotgun tokes wood turn into a kiss.

corse darlene had her reasons too on a counta she had dun made the quaintunts of her future husbin, witch that wood be professer william streicher, only he ast me to call him bill the time we met. she had dun tole me she wuz in luv with him. but she also tole me she wuz confused on a counta she wuz in luv with me jes as much as him n i wuz her furst n all. i wont lie. i shoulda bin hurt whenever she wuz a'tellin me this, but whut i felt wuz a jolt of egcitemint in my belly on a counta i wuz thankin bout gretchen. so as ye kin see, my hart wuz confusd by my lust n my hed wuz confused by my hart.

n thats how we cum to the conclushun that we mite should seprate, witch thats whut we dun.

i had to tell mama n when i did she sed, 'bewar of whut ye wont.'

so with a lawsy day i looked round at everythang i had, witch we had dun bought us about everthang a bidy could wont fer the house. tv. stereo. lp records. couch. chars. coffee table. kitchin junk. a set of pliances. bed. ptichers to hang on the wall. books n bookcases. everthang ye could wont. ceptn twuz powerful lonesum n lawsy day wuz makin sense to me.

then i gut to wunderin whut wood daddy say bout i n i knew twood be 'this too shall pass.' n i give thatn sum thought n figgered he wuz rite. wernt no reason to git down in the dumps jes after a'gittin jes whut ye wonted.

daddy wuz full of sayins to hep ye git through thangs. 'aint nuthin ever as good or bad as it seems.' thatn seemd to set rite well with 'this too shall pass,' so i tuck out a few otherns lack 'whut dont kill lye makes ye stronger' n 'ifn thay wuz no hard times, good times wood seem hard' n 'ye kin fine the good or the bad in innythang, so witchn will it be?' n 'ye gone curse the dark or lite a candle.'

n them sayins had me up n a'bangin on the peeano. daddy also used to say that ye git thru life by always havin sumthin to look ford to lack fishin or playin golf, witch he lacked to play golf but i dint even tho we played many a time. n i membered him a'talkin bout havin thangs to look ford to as i wuz a bangin on the peeano n i thought to myself i wuz a gone see gretchen the verr nex day n i wood look ford to that.

but thangs dint wurk out jes the way i wuz specktin to on a counta i had gut my bruther brew to cum out to the farm.

brew wuz 2 years youngern eli n fer sum reason he never played with us much whenever we wuz lil. now he wuz growd n seem lack we had sum thangs in common lack how we luved to fish n hike n camp n jes be outdoors, n after he n eli had dun helped me move all them thangs over to kingston, we put on harvest by neil young n lit us a joint.

direckly i gut to tellin em bout lil dude northfleet n how much i luved to ride. i ast em did they ever wonta cum out to the farm, n corse eli sed no, witch he had dun had his transformayshun by then n ye couldnt hardly git im to do nuthin. brew wuz differnt. i tole him how much fun we had n how we wood race em n i wuz braggin how lil dude northfleet n me could beat inny horse on the farm without even a bridle in his mouth ner saddle on his back ner nuthin. so he sed he could cum out n since he wuz wurkin day shif how bout mundy?

so next day long bout 4:45 here he cum in his datsun 240z n still a'wearin his uniform, witch he wuz a gard out at y-12. n soons he hollered out 'hey bro' them four gurls wuz all over him, n ye kin see why on a counta he gut the looks in the fambly with his green eyes n curly har n tall lanky frame, witch he wuz leest six feet three.

we saddled up sum horses n rode up to the tree n purt soon i seen whar gretchen wuz a'sittin over by him apart frum us n she wuz astin did the gun have bullets n he wuz a'showin her how twurked. n i could see he wuz powrful happy.

then he ast bout whuther he couldnt move in with me on a counta we could split the rent n thay wuz 2 bedrooms n he wonted to git out of the house n quit livin with mama, witch she could be a bit much, n i sed twood be a pleshur to have him.

n i wuz a thankin twood hep beat down the lonliness, but twernt a munth befor gretchen moved in. n twuz a mitey tortchur to bar. she lacked to git hi bettern innybidy i ever met n ifn we wuz alone whenever she wuz hi she flurted lack crazy, witch that happend too often on a counta brew wurked swang shif. n that led to a bad momint whenever i ast her wuz she really in luv with brew or wuz she a'wontin sumthin with me n she put on a ack lack she wuz shocked n that made thangs rathur uncumfterbull tween us.

i gut em to switch my schedule at wurk to graveyard shif n that mint i dint run into gretchen much a tall n whenever brew wuz on midnites we would smoke a bowl together, witch i started lacking pipes whenever virgil cum out of the army n give me that meershum pipe he got in turkey. n we wood discuss thangs, n i could see he wuz a'gittin on the seryus side of luvin gretchen.

n that led to me a'talkin bout darlene, n that led to such an achin in my hart till i dint know how i could go on.

lawsy day.

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