wandering hillbilly

pains of buddy don:
whut are migraine hedaches?

fer the longest, whenever sumbidy wood cumplain bout havin em a migraine hedache, i wuz skepticull. i figgerd twuz a way of gittin out of havin to do unpleasunt thangs or of gittin a day off. my own mama cumplaind of em n i dint even give her the benefit of the doubt. i had a gurlfrien once who could git one frum a flashin lite n im ashamed to add mitt how it jes made me mad n i never bleeved she wuz in no real pain. so in sum karmic sense, i spoze i deserved ever migraine episode i gut, witch thays been a nuff alreddy.

but whut i wonted to rite about today wuz how i am purrplexed bout whut a migraine really is. seemed lack fer a while twuz related to stress sum kinda way, only i dun had sum of the wurst ones whenever i wuz off frum wurk n not in inny kinda stress that i could tell. i had one of my wurst two attacks durin the ded times at wurk, one durin the slow time of thanksgivin n the nex durin the slow time of chrismus/new years. i had em when i had a easy job that dint put much stress on me.

so ifn tiz stress that causes em, in my case tiz hard to figger. miz bd has also noticed how i git em more whenever the weathers cold n dry i seem to git more of em. she also noticed how the one befor this cum after we had drunk sum red wine with dinner, witch i havent repeated that test.

so who knows whut causes em? but i have larnt a lot bout whut ye mite feel whenever thays one a'cummin on. i had red bout how sum folks gits a verr sensitve scalp whenever theys about to git one n shore a nuff on saturdy, it felt lack i had scraped a layer of skin n bone off the top ridge of my hed. i kep specktin to touch it n cum away with bloody fangers, but twuz only a feelin. i had noticed havin that kind a feelin before, but i hadnt figgerd if it cum befor a migraine, witch that wuz the case on sundy.

tuther thang ye here bout is how thars a vishul aura of sum kind n thats a nuther thang ye dont recognize furst time it cums round. after a while, tiz almos lack that aura thang is painful n ye wonta try to tell yerself ye aint a'seein it. but ye cant deny whuts real n dont matter ifn ye do on a counta the ackshul migraine will be sumthin cant nobidy ignore.

as i menchuned befor, whenever i furst gut a migraine, twuz a matter of startin to vomit early in the mornin n keepin on a'vomitin all day long till i wore myself out, fell asleep, n mayhap wood wake up feelin better. mayhap not. sumtimes it takes two days to git thru one of these thangs. but thang wuz, i figgerd twuz a problem with my stumach so i wuz takin thangs to try to calm it down. only problem wuz i wood vomit em rite back up.

once the docter diagnosed the problem, thangs gut better. i started takin two excedrin migraine strangth tablets ever mornin as soon as i git up. he sed my habit of thankin i wuz sick to my stumach n treatin that feelin wuz keepin me frum gittin pain medicayshun on time. so it seems lack takin sum pain killer ever mornin has hepped. but i still git em now n agin.

thays minny a site fer folks that gits miraines. one of the best is thisn called M.A.G.N.U.M., witch that stands fer Migraine Awareness Group: A National Understanding for Mirgaineurs, witch migraineurs is a fancy wurd fer folks lack me that gits migraines. one of the best parts of thisn is how it talks bout the myths n realities of migraines:

• MYTH: A MIGRAINE IS JUST A BAD HEADACHE.
  REALITY: MIGRAINE IS A DISEASE, A HEADACHE IS ONLY A SYMPTOM. IN ADDITION, THE CAUSE OF MIGRAINE PAIN IS THE OPPOSITE OF THE CAUSE OF HEADACHE PAIN.
  
  
• MYTH: MIGRAINE IS CAUSED BY PSYCHOLOGICAL FACTORS, SUCH AS STRESS AND DEPRESSION.
  REALITY: MIGRAINE IS A NEUROLOGICAL DISEASE, NOT A PSYCHOLOGICAL DISORDER.
  
  
• MYTH: MIGRAINE IS NOT LIFE THREATENING, JUST ANNOYING.
  REALITY: MIGRAINE CAN BE LIFE THREATENING, INDUCING SUCH CONDITIONS AS STROKE AND COMA.
  
  
• MYTH: ANY DOCTOR WILL RECOGNIZE AND PROPERLY TREAT MIGRAINE.
  REALITY: MIGRAINE IS ONE OF THE MOST MISDIAGNOSED, MISTREATED AND LEAST UNDERSTOOD DISEASES.

heres the part bout migraines i wonta talk bout: after havin had a goodly number of em, i kin see whar folks mite could thank they wuz possessd by sum kinda evil thang durin such a spell. fer one thang, once it gits a'goin, it almost seems lack ye aint properly in yer bidy no more. it feels lack thars a dense cloud of fog twixt wharever ye are n wharever the outside worl is. yer reflexes is slowed. ye cant hardly thank nuthin.

but the mos amazin thang of all to me is how miz bd kin tell as quick as i kin when tiz over. mayhap i fall into that late afternoon sleep n wake up better. i dont even know it, but as quick as i say sumthin, she will anser, 'yer back!' tiz as if i had lef my bidy fer a while n finely cum back toot. frum the inside, tiz as if thay could be sumthin takin over n keepin whutever tiz that i am hid in a corner trine not to vomit while whutever takes over gits furst look frum the bidys eyes n furst listen thru the bidys ears, that kinda thang.

so taint hard to see how folks durin sum parts of our histry figgerd sum kinds of illness wuz due to spirtchull possesshun. whut complicates thangs even moren that is how i know that i, 'buddy don,' am jes lack one of them spirts: i cum over the 'author' lack a bad hedache n once i git in, i git his fangers to the keybird sos i kin live by ritin down my story. even the 'author' wunders bout sum of the thangs i rite n whar they cum frum. ye kin here him talkin bout 'whut buddy don writ' even tho twuz clearly his fangers a'doin the ritin.

n ifn ye stick with the tale ima spinnin twixt the stolen cycles of the ackshul 'author,' ye gonna find out how hes dun been able to split hisself into moren one persun befor. fack is, thay wuz a time thar wuz the 'author' n a spanish speakin fella name of 'el papito.'

point is, i been meditatin -- or whutever ye mite call whut ye do whenever yer lyin in a fetal possishun with the covers over yer hed n trine not to vomit -- i been meditatin on this thang bout how a migraine is lack havin a intruder thar in yer hed sum kinda way. n whenever i real eyes jes how much the 'author' has been able to split hisself into pieces sos he could becum folks n rite as if he wuz them -- or even sos he could be 'el papito' -- he wunders ifn thars a point beyond witch he cant cum back to bein the one person he really is.