Tuesday, December 20, 2005

pinions of buddy don: winnin them harts n minds

whenever ye gut ye a war on a tacktick a'gone on lack we do – that thar war on terror – ye kin say mos innythang bout how to win, but thonly way to doot is to cunvints folks not to use the tacktick (terrorist acks).

ye gut to cunvints em that ye stand fer better values than yer enemies do.

ifn ye turn out to be wursern yer enemies, then them that wonts to attack kin use yer wurserness agin ye. they kin claim that thar attackin ye on a counta yer evil or willin to compromise yer own demockrussy or dont stand fer whut ye claim to stand fer.

as jesus putt it (matthew 7:15-20):
15 Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves.

16 Ye shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of thistles?

17 Even so every good tree bringeth forth good fruit; but a corrupt tree bringeth forth evil fruit.

18 A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither can a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit.

19 Every tree that bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down, and cast into the fire.

20 Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them.
so whut kinda fruit are we a'bearin? whut reasons are we givin them harts n minds fer wontin to cum over to our side? heres the list best i kin tell:
  • in our cuntry, ever citizen is innocent until prooved guilty the presdint thanks thar suspishus

  • in our cuntry, ifn ye git arrested, ye gut a rite to a speedy trial a chants fer a trial or military tribunal ceptn ifn the presdint thanks yer suspishus

  • in our cuntry, ifn ye git arrested, ye gut the rite to consult a lawyer (court appointed ifn ye caint git yer own) ye gut no rite to see a lawyer ifn the presdint thanks yer suspishus

  • in our cuntry, ifn ye git arrested, ye gut a rite to see the evidents agin ye ye mite could git to see the evidents agin ye ceptn ye caint ifn the presdint thanks yer suspishus

  • in our cuntry, ifn ye git arrested, ye gut a rite to be charged with sum kinda crime or let a'loose ye git to stay in prison indefinitely ifn the presdint thanks yer suspishus

  • in our cuntry, ifn ye git arrested, ye gut a rite to make a fone call to let them ye luvs know whuts happend to ye no need to let nobidy know nuthin bout ye nor bout whut mite coulda happend to ye ifn the presdint thanks yer suspishus

  • in our cuntry, ye gut the rite to be safe in yer own home frum bein searched without a warrnt to putt up with the fack that ye caint have liberty ifn the presdint thanks – fer yer own securty – ye mite need to have yer own home searched with no warrnt n no news that twuz dun ifn the presdint thanks yer suspishus

  • in our cuntry, ye gut the rite to talk to yer kids in skool oversears without wurryin bout no fedrul gummint tappin yer fone to face that fack that havin fullbrite n rhodes skolars amung yer kids mite could make ye suspishus, witch the presdint has dun splaind how hes gut the rite to do whutever he wonts to ifn the presdint thanks yer suspishus

  • in our cuntry, ye dont half to ackcept yer gummint kidnappin folks n sendin em to other cuntries sos they kin be tortchurd agressivly interrorgated ifn the presdint thanks thar suspishus
as ye kin see, we gut us sum verr fragrunt fruit a'growin frum our tree.

in other cuntries, ye gut dicktaters that thanks tiz ok to claim folks is guilty befor thar arrested, hold folks with no trial, hold em without showin em inny evidents of thar crime, hold em without accusin em of committin a crime, arrest folks with no evidents, putt folks in prison indefinitely, refuse to let em talk to thar lawyer, refuse to add mitt who ye dun arrested, refuse to let folks ye arrest have inny fone calls, refuse to let the famblies of them ye arrest know they been arrested, search thar homes without tellin em, kidnap suspishus folks, n even tortchur suspishus folks to find out whut they know.

as ye kin see, them thar harts n minds is bound to find our side much better on a counta ... uh, that is, on a counta ... our presdint dun tole us so! to thar! take that, osama dun ben fergutt saddam ben taliban zarakiri!

ifn ye doubt our presdint, he mite could thank yer suspishus, so be keerful!

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