Thursday, April 30, 2009

amazement of buddy don: a nuther Amazon revue

twuz my grate good fortchun to git wurd that thays now a secunt revue of shoot the devil up on heres the lank.

bleeve it or not, thays still a few of them furst 49 left so dont deelay ifn ye wonta git ye one. jes foller this lank. as a reeminder, heres whut ye git:
  1. a brand new copy of shoot the devil packed in rice paper with luv

  2. the book will be chopped by my own persnull chop, witch tiz the chinese care-ackters fer wandering hillbilly

  3. twill be numberd as witchever one of the furst 49 ye happend to git (fer instunts, it could be 48/49!)

  4. finely, ifn ye give me two wurds fer the subjeck of a waka ye wood lack to be writ jes fer ye, i will cumpose sed waka n rite it by hand in yer own copy of the book
go read them revues n see ifn taint the kinda book ye orta be readin yer ownself.

finely, thankee, thankee, thankee bonnie! (ye half to foller one of them lanks in the verr post yer a'readin ifn ye wonta know who bonnie is.)

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

eggscuses of buddy don: sleepin in hot weather

i had a terrbull time sleepin on a counta me n miz bd dint wonta start the air condishuner on fer one nite when thay wuz a cooler frunt a'cummin in. but twernt easy to sleep, witch it dint seem lack i dun much of that till this mornin, when twuz too much.

a nuff of that!

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

waka of budouadana: Peak

Magnolias blush,
Tulips strut in proud colors,
Cherry blossoms peak,
Yet all too quickly they fade
Into the heat of late spring.

Monday, April 27, 2009

pomes of buddy don: What Are These Fools Thinking?!?

What Are These Fools Thinking?!?
What are these fools thinking, when they attack,
The high-minded lawyers who came to assist
Our leaders who wanted to invade Iraq
Yet couldn’t procure proof from nabbed terrorists?

We’d learned in Korea lessons that SERE’d
As torture induced downed airmen to confess
To crimes for which their homeland could be smeared
For one will say anything under duress.

Though in those old days 'to waterboard'
Was widely called torture, even by us,
Its use as a tool *now* can’t be ignored!!!
Time bombs could be ticking!!! What’s all the fuss?!?

We’ve all heard it said, 'We don't torture' it’s true —
But we get 'good intell' if we ever do!

Friday, April 24, 2009

waka of budouadana: Calendar

White pear blossoms
Fall as new green leaves emerge,
Charting the Earth’s course
Round the sun as precisely
As our modern calendar.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

pitchers tuck by buddy don: them magnolyas at that brooklyn garden

me n miz bd gut ourself out to the brooklyn botanick garden over the weekend, witch twuz a purty day, sum of them cherry blossoms wuz out, n the magnolyas wuz at thar peak. corse that means ye wont hardly be able to see nuthin on a counta all them folks in the way.

i figgerd i woodnt try to git pitchers of the flora, but the fauna, the human fauna, wuz thar in all thar glory, mosly takin pitchers, so heres a few i tuck of them includin one of a feller takin a pitcher i had to be in ...

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

revues of buddy don: 'haircut stories' by lydia copeland

i have writ about the ritin of lydia copeland, who she just cum out with a chapbook of short wurks name of 'haircut stories.'

i gut me one by droppin by the site above, whar ye kin also read sum blurbs on the book.

tiz a slim volume but each of the lil flash fickshun pieces in it remind me a lil of the tent harry potter wuz usin in the last book: frum the outside, they look tiny, but ifn ye stop inside, a hole worl opens up. each time ye read one of these lil prose pomes, witch thats how they wurk on ye, thays a lil more that ye notiss n larn. one piece name of 'haircut' kep growin in strangth till it seemd lack i couldnt read it without gittin tears in my eyes. thays a grater sense of depth each time ye read inny of em. i have dun red the hole thang about six times, but i aint tired of it yet.

i real eyes ye gut to watch yer dollars, witch tiz a good reason not to git a copy of shoot the devil on a counta tiz a bit pricey. i wish i could do sumthin bout that. on tuther hand, ye kin git ye a copy of haircut stories fer lil or nuthin. n ever time ye read it, ye will git a lil more of a story than the time befor.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

more good luck of buddy don: his book gits its furst amazon revue!

taint as big a sprize as ye mite could thank, but a verr nice persun has dun writ a revue of shoot the devil over on amazon, witch ye kin read it by clickin here.

heres a lil quote frum that revue, witch twuz writ by anne johnson of The Gods Are Bored n Six Word Blog:
His hillbilly writing style notwithstanding, Buddy Don is highly literate, attending college, working the computers at Oak Ridge Laboratory, presiding over lively parties at his rural farm, pondering the Big Questions. This novel suggests -- as do so many others done in vernacular -- that there's no clear correlation between conversational idiom and intelligence level. "Shoot the Devil" is a fine piece of work. In quality paperback format, it will withstand multiple readings without blemish. Well worth the price of admission.
did i menchun that thays still a few of the furst 49 left?

ye kin git in on this grate deal: ye git the book, chopped, signed n with a waka writ rite in it based on two wurds ye give me fer a subjeck.

no order will be refused ... n did i fergit that ye git free shippin in these here united states? n ifn ye order frum sumwhars else, we will see whut we kin do to make that shippin free also.

so take add vantage of the eggschange rates n git ye a unique piece of wurk uh, art.

Monday, April 20, 2009

pitchers tuck by buddy don: yunguns

thay wuz a big birthdy party this weekend fer my great nefyew liam, witch twuz his secunt birthdy. turnt out that most everybidy cum, including ezekiel, so heres a few pitchers of them yunguns ...

heres the birthdy boy offerin a carrot to his Grandie...

here he is eatin one of his favert thangs, witch he calls em 'matoes' ...

mayhap this shirt wuz the birthdy boys favert new gift, witch he wuz showin it off rite away ...

corse, ezekiel wuz thar n doin all his latest tricks, witch he has dun larnt how to stand up long as he kin hold onto sumthin ...

he wuz also fassinated by the ceilin fan, witch he hattent never seen one befor...

Thursday, April 16, 2009

criticks of buddy don: whut a cuple more comminters sed

fer the most part, my life has bin one whar ye could say twuz better lucky than good. fer proof of that, cunsidder the hi qualty of them that rites commints here.

i writ bout anonnymus wundern whuther i wuz trine to be funny or sumthin by ritin in hillbilly dialeck. thay wuz sum good commints that cum frum that, witch one of em leads to a verr good idee (thankee smijer!).

we kin save whut smijer had to say bout them commints frum anonnymus till the end on a counta how it brangs up a good idee. meanwhile, twuz my verr good luck to have this commint frum anne johnson frum the gods are bored n six word blog:
"Anonymous" doesn't have a lock on proper grammar him/herself. Writing must be true to the heart and soul, and this is the way you want to do it, BD. To thine own self be true.
lucky a nuff fer me, i dont know no other way to do it.

the next commint cums frum a feller i aint never met but feel lack i bin a'knowin all my life, who that wood be buck frum the same blog as smijer, tete-a-tete-a-tete (caint make them symbulls cum out rite on blogger fer sum reason):
The first time I ever read this blog I laughed out loud because it reads almost exactly like me and many of my kin folks talk.

I think it is funny as hell and purty much dead on.

I thank if we followed the blood river Buddy we would find that many of mine are kin to yorn.
mayhap i feel lack i know buck on a counta we could be cuzins or sumthin. twoodnt sprize me n twood be a honor ifn turnt out to be true!

the next commint is nigh onto poetry, cummin frum a comminter name of marcia, who she rites a grate blog bout knittin n purt near ever other subjeck under the sun name of purls before swine:
Oh buddy don. I have to get to bed right now, but need to put this down before I forget. Over the past few weeks I've been gazing on my own navel on the idea of of "personal vernacular". At this time, however, I will spare you the configuration of the lint, therein.

Personal vernacular is a powerful thing. It is rich and poor. It connects and separates. It has sound and imagery. It can sustain thought without a word spoken. It is a word spoken, without need of thought.

It is the blankie that comforts and helps us transition to new worlds and experiences.

It is the wallpaper of our soul.
lack i sed, the way marcia knits wurds together is pure poetry. i wish i coulda cum up with half them grate metafors bout persunal vernackular.

finely, heres whut smijer had to say, witch this is such a good idee that i am a'gone try to see whuther i kin make sumthin of it:
Have you ever done any audio? What I hear when I read you probably isn't exactly what you hear when you write... I'd love to hear the 'real thing'.

I'm afraid I've all but lost recollection of the dialects I grew up with, but I love to hear any country dialect, including European ones... they all sound a little bit like home to me.
fack is, i have dun a lil audio, but i aint dun whut i shoulda dun alreddy dun ere now: record a lil bit of this here dialeck that i kin here clear as a bell in my mind but kin convey to the page only so good (never as good as i kin here it).

fer eggsample, nigh onto everbidy knows that down south the furst persun singular is pronounced without the dipthong that makes it two vowel sounds, a "aaah" follerd by a "ee" sound. we dont add the 'ee'. tiz almost impossibull to capchur that in letters, so i dun give it up n settled on usin 'i' on a counta i figger most folks know bout how that wurd is pronounced by folk lack me. thang is, i aint a'gone putt 'aaah sed this' nor 'aaah sed that' but ye kindly git the idee.

innywho, thankee one n all fer yer criticisum. ye caint git a nuff of that in this world fer the most part n i am verr gratefull fer it.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

pomes of buddy don: Our Only Shield

Our Only Shield
Although we outspend all other nations
To defend ideals we oft forget,
We feel a sense of growing desperation,
As bands of criminals still pose a threat.

Like British redcoats marching in their files
Through rugged wilderness of colonies
To be defeated by guerrilla wiles,
We think our navy master of the seas.

We do not understand the changed terrain —
Of nations whose people are set ablaze
By terrorists, by pirates, the insane —
Who grow by declaiming our errant ways.

Great power is an awesome thing to wield,
But moral high ground is our only shield.

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

pitchers tuck by buddy don: statchew of jackie gleason

purty near everbidy in these united states has seen a episode or two of the honeymooners. thays a statchew of the mane carackter of that show (ifn thays a mane one on a counta ye caint magine the show without norton n alice), ralph cramden, in frunt of the port authorty bus stayshun. i tuck a few pitchers of it tuther day, witch heres one of em ...

Thursday, April 09, 2009

criticks of buddy don: whut anonnymus sed

ever so often sumbidy cums by to read this here blog that aint one of the 4 or 5 that reads it on a reglar basis. tiz often the case that they wonta attack my use of hillbilly dialeck. let me point out now that i aint trine to say how ever hillbilly talks: whut i rite is as close as i kin cum to the dialeck i herd used by my fambly whenever we wood all gather n tell tales.

thang is, i dont bleeve inny two people use eggzackly the same langwage. everbidy has thar own. tiz true that skools try to flatten the langwage n make us all use it the same eggzack way, but langwage dont wurk thataway: ifn it did, ye wood be able to read beowulf direckly without translayshun.

innywho, here is whut anonnymus had to say:
Not sure how your attempts at the local vernacular are intended as humor.
i wood hope them thats been readin this here blog knows bettern to thank my 'attempts at the local vernacular' are intended as humor. they aint. tiz my means of recordin how them i wuz razed by happend to talk. fer me, tiz the best way to tell stories n i lack to practiss ever chants i git.

Wednesday, April 08, 2009

pinions of buddy don: ifn tennessee is on the frunt page of the ny times ...

... then taint lackly to be good news, lessn tiz about them lady vols. todays ny times aint no different, witch it has a articull name of Firm Acted as Tutor in Selling Towns Risky Deals:
LEWISBURG, Tenn. — Five years ago, this small factory town was struggling to pay the interest on a bond for new sewers. Bob Phillips, Lewisburg’s part-time mayor and full-time pharmacist, was urged by the town’s financial adviser, an investment bank named Morgan Keegan & Company, to engage in a complex financial transaction to lower interest rates.

When a Lewisburg official attended a state-sponsored seminar intended to lay out the transaction’s benefits and risks, he was taught by investment bankers from Morgan Keegan.

And when Lewisburg decided to go ahead with the transaction, who was there to make the deal? Morgan Keegan.

In January, local officials were shocked to discover that annual interest payments on the bond had quadrupled to $1 million. Morgan Keegan, they said, did not serve them well in any of its roles.
dont that jes beat all? sum of the wurst news is how them industries is movin out of tennessee, witch the menchun of sanford pencils moving to mexico is a prime eggsample. jes brakes yer hart that these jobs trickle down to other cuntries (on a counta trickle down always means jobs fer them that wurks fer the least money, no matter whuther tiz in this cuntry or sum othern).

Tuesday, April 07, 2009

waka of budouadana: Meaning

Cruel reality
Cares not whether we live
Or die abruptly,
So life only has meaning
If we live as if it did.

Friday, April 03, 2009

pitchers tuck by buddy don: Mr. Dienstbier

ye dun herd how a pitcher is wurth a thousund wurds ... thisn purty much gives ye a lil insight into miz bd ...

Thursday, April 02, 2009

waka of budouadana: Creeping

Like a creeping cat,
Haunches set expectantly,
Poised to leap and strike,
So the energy of Spring
Is set to burst into bloom.

Wednesday, April 01, 2009

waka of budouadana: Hope

As buds become blooms,
Adorning green leaves with pink,
So we turn with hope
To another beginning,
Breathing deep the fleeting scent.